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She was so strikingly beautiful in a black satin cocktail dress that hugged her frame. She had these amazing curves, and her face was like a porcelain doll.Ravishingwas the word for her kind of beauty. Her looks were the first thing I noticed about her.
She was dancing with a little girl. I assumed she was her daughter, and I smiled at the sight of them doing these ridiculous moves.Saturday Night Fevertype of air pointing to doing the hustle and into the backstroke. None of it made sense, and yet they were laughing and having a great time.
Then, I heard her speak.
“Ainsley, the key to happiness is dancing. Having a bad day? Let it loose in your kitchen. Want to celebrate your aunt getting hitched? Get freaky in the backyard. And never ever let anyone let you feel self-conscious about your moves because the most irresistible people in this world know how to dance like no one is watching.”
“That’s silly, Tara. Why would I want to dance alone?”
“If you don’t love yourself, who will?” Tara told the girl as she twirled her under her arm. “It’s called self-confidence, kid. No one should take that from you.”
Her words hit me in the gut. I had to stand up and walk away from the table. I found myself by the bar, getting myself a bourbon. A man and woman were arguing while emptying a box of liquor. I felt more comfortable with the bickering couple instead of listening to the beautiful woman on the dance floor. This, I was used to. The last few years of my life hadn’t been hearts and flowers.
I was having my drink while standing at the bar. My eyes still wandered her way. I figured she was married and living a life of false promises that she hadn’t realized weren’t going to come true. A woman still in the days of a pretend happy life.
Then, I found out it was worse than I’d thought.
“Who is that woman?” I asked my mother as she walked up to the bar to get a chardonnay.
She turned around and pointed rather obviously toward Tara on the dance floor. “That woman is Tara Parsons. She has propositioned every man at this party, and it is quite desperate if you ask me. You see the table of police officers over there? I bet she’s run through them like a freight train in the middle of the night.”
I nearly spilled my bourbon at my mother’s analogy, wondering if she even knew what it meant.
“She’s single?” I asked, surprised my assessment of her had been incorrect.
“Desperately so. She’ll do anything for a man because he’s looking for love and she wants to get married immediately. Mark my words. She’s a lot of fun, but a world of trouble. Stay away from that one.”
I nodded, almost relieved my mother had squashed the bubble of attraction I had to Tara.
I wouldn’t have gone near her if she was taken, but knowing she was single, I might have been caught in her trap. How could I not? She was gorgeous and had sass that oozed from her making you want to see what she’d do or say next.
When I saw her coming toward me, I heeded my mother’s words and walked the other way.
I did it the next time I saw her at a family party.
She was wearing pants and an oversize silky blouse this time, so I couldn’t even blame the sexy clothing on how I noticed her instantly. She was telling a story to my cousin Kevin and his wife.
“There I was, hiding in the closet in this guy’s bedroom because his mother had come home and he wasn’t supposed to have girls over. He was twenty-six! I should have known better than to date a man who still lived with his mother, but I never dreamed it would be so bad that he’d usher me into his wardrobe the minute she appeared in the house.”
“What did you do?” Kevin asked.
“I stayed there for about five minutes when I realized,Fuck this, I’m an accomplished woman with a killer personality and perfect tits who should be pampered on satin sheets and not crouching next to his Nikes.I opened that door while they were mid-conversation, flipped my hair over my shoulder, and sauntered my fine ass out of that house.”
I knew in that moment that Tara Parsons was either batshit crazy or the most self-confident woman I had ever seen.
My days of avoiding her were limited when I went to my brother Will’s wedding.
I was fixing Jesse’s tie when a woman appeared. She had on a rose-pink dress, and her hair was pinned up in a pretty updo that the bridal party was wearing. She was walking through the lobby when Izzy, Will’s new stepdaughter, was pacing back and forth with a paper in her hand.
I almost didn’t recognize Tara. Once she started speaking, I knew it was her.
“You can’t be nervous, Izzy. You got this! You’ve been practicing your rap-style maid-of-honor toast for months. Here’s what you’re gonna do. You’re going to walk onto that dance floor and picture everyone in shark onesies.”
“Huh?” Izzy sounded confused.
So did Jesse and I, and we made faces at one another as we eavesdropped on the conversation.
“I thought I was supposed to picture them naked.”
