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Not many people came into this room.
It was why I kept the things in it that I did.
Not just my clothes, but memories and achievements. Ones that I didn’t feel needed to be boasted or be asked questions of by hanging them in the open. Now though, Valen had seen them, and I could practically hear her reading the framed news articles that decorated one of the walls.
Designer Baby Saves Brother with Bone Marrow
and
Brother Once Again Becomes Hero with Kidney Donation
“Is that you?”
I turned slowly, my eyes following her finger as she pointed to one of the many pictures on the wall. This one, in particular, was of me and my older brother, Gabe. We were both lying in hospital beds, holding hands between us. “Yeah,” I said quietly. “I got this scar that day.”
I dropped my eyes to my abdomen, brushing my finger lightly over the uneven scar on my left side. It was a little jagged, not exactly pretty.
“You had a kidney transplant,” she stated with confidence, inching a little closer as she examined it with her eyes. My muscles tightened as she studied me, this almost beautiful look of wonder on her face. “You needed one?”
“I gave one.”
Her eyes instantly shot up, meeting mine while her mouth dropped open. “What? Who?”
It wasn’t a story I explained to many people. Not if I didn’t have to. Sharing that part of myself was daunting, but for the first time in years, my palms didn’t sweat, my heart didn’t race, and I found the words falling with ease from my mouth. “Have you ever heard of savior siblings?”
Her brow instantly pulled together, and she slowly shook her head from side to side. “I haven’t.”
I leaned back against the built-in units that lined my wardrobe, my hands gripping the edge tightly as all those emotions resurfaced like it was yesterday. “My older brother, Gabe, was diagnosed with leukemia when he was five years old,” I explained, pushing through the uncomfortable twist in my stomach when I said his name out loud. “He needed stem cells to try and fight the cancer, but they couldn’t find a match. So, they made one. Me.”
“Wait!” There was no hiding her emotions as she processed the bomb I’d just dropped. I was quickly becoming obsessed with just how expressive Valen’s face was. The way her eyes sparkled and her smile stretched across her whole face, it was the brightest I’d ever fucking seen. But it also meant when I caught signs of pain or hurt in her features, I practically felt them in my damn chest, and I was ready to kill.
“You’re gonna have to give me something else,” she started, taking a step back so she could lean into the wall. “Because my mind has just taken what you said, and it’s running.”
“Yeah,” I replied, unable to keep from letting out a short laugh, realizing just how ridiculous I was about to sound. “I was made in a little dish in a lab, then tested with a handful of other embryos to see which of us lucky little group of cells was the perfect match.”
It sounded crazy, but it wasn’t exactly a completely odd prospect these days. There were even movies and television shows that covered the conversation and debate around whether it was ethical to create a child to serve a purpose.
A medical purpose.
One that would mean, on some levels, that child had no rights over their own body.
“The bone marrow was the first attempt to cure Gabe. I was less than a year old,” I continued, finding I wasn’t hitting the wall I usually did, the one I often built myself to keep people from seeing my vulnerabilities. Instead, the bricks were on a pile at my feet, and there was not a single thing stopping her from seeing me. Therealme.
“Then he got sick again, and he underwent full renal failure this time. Chemo, more cells, tests. So many fucking tests. He managed to make it through, and after a couple of years in remission, I gave Gabe my kidney.”
Her chest rose dramatically as she inhaled and exhaled. “You only look little,” she murmured, her eyes again drifting over to the photograph on the wall.
“Mmm…” I agreed. “I spent my eighth birthday in bed because I’d had surgery two days previous.”
Her shoulders slumped, and as she returned her gaze to meet mine, her eyes glistened in the fluorescent lights. “That’s a heavy burden,” Valen said quietly. “I’m sorry you had to carry that on your shoulders.”
I lifted my chin, trying to keep the lump in my throat from rising to the surface and blocking my ability to talk. “You know, that’s the first time anyone has ever said that.”
My parents had never.
They believed they’d made me for a purpose.
And it was my job to fulfill it.
