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He frowns, his hands pausing on my waist. “Can’t what?”
“I can’t tell you the real reason because it’s embarrassing.”
“It’s not embarrassing for me. You don’t need to feel that way. You can tell my anything, Fran.”
Oh, here goes nothing. “I put it on because I … I think I want to be with you.”
“Be with me?”
“Bewith you,” I say pointedly.
His eyebrows raise. “Ah. Be with me.” I flush, ducking my head. He slips his finger under my chin, bringing my gaze back up. “Hey, listen. You don’t have to be embarrassed about that at all. Trust me. You think I haven’t wanted to be with you from the moment I met you? Of course, I did. I do.”
“I don’t really know what to do,” I admit. “I mean, I know the basics, but I don’t know where to go from here.”
“Just follow my lead.” He cups my face and brings his lips to mine. It’s an explosion of electricity. I gasp and wrap my arms around his shoulders while Leo wraps his arms around my back, drawing me in closer. His entire body is pressed against mine. It’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before. This type of physical connection is foreign to me, yet it feels just right.
Leo walks me back to the bed. My legs hit the edge, and I fall back, bringing him down with me. He never stops kissing me. The only sound in the room is our heavy breathing. Leo roams his hands up and down my body, sending chills over me. I let myself relax into it and focus on the feeling.
My legs part slightly as Leo settles himself between them. I can’t believe this is really happening. I truly always thought I’d be alone forever, so to be experiencing this, it’s on a whole different level. Leo is consuming my lips with his, making it hard for me to breathe.
Leo shifts against me, sending a spike of pleasure over my body. I gasp. Leo tenses and pulls back.
The frown on his face makes me jerk back. “What’s wrong?” I ask.
“I can’t do this,” he mutters.
“What?” Did I hear him right. “Leo …”
He scrambles off me, rubbing his hand over his face as he paces. “This isn’t right,” he says more to himself. “I can’t do this. I’m doing it for the wrong reasons.”
“Leo?” I reach out for him, but he walks away. “What’s going on? Do … do you not want me?” Of course, he wouldn’t. No one has ever wanted me. My own mother has never wanted me. Why would Leo even want to talk to me, let alone touch me? I’ve never been anything special.
He blows out rough air. “I want you,” he says gruffly. “I just … can’t.” There’s a pain in his eyes that confuses me. When he turns for the door, I follow him.
“Why are you doing this? I thought you wanted this?”
“I do!” He spins back around to face me, anguish written on his face. “I do.”
“Then why are you stopping this?”
“Because …” He drops his head. “Because I just can’t. It’s not fair to you.”
“What isn’t fair?”
“I can’t explain, ok. Just trust me.”
“I’m trying to trust you, but I don’t even understand you, Leo.” I grab his hand, forcing him to look back at me. “I put myself out there for you. You said you wanted this. What changed? You owe me that, at least.”
“I can’t say. I don’t want to hurt you, Fran. But if we have sex, I will be hurting you.”
“Do you mean physically?” He starts walking down the hallway, and I follow him. “I know there can be some pain, but I’m sure it’ll be fine. Leo?” I grab his arm, stopping him. Normally, I’d let him walk away. I wouldn’t put up a fight.
But I’m ready for a fight.
I’m ready to say what’s on my mind.
“Leo, just talk to me.”
