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I smiled kindly but my head spun. Why did we do this to ourselves? Force each other to spend our lives with people we wouldn’t ordinarily have chosen? Why? For money – that was why. But did our exorbitant wealth make any of us happy? My eyes scanned the room. Bertie Barrington was mainlining Krug while leaching over Miles Goldsmith’s seventeen-year-old daughter. His wife was tipping back sherry and looking in every direction but that of her husband. The St Johns sat with their backs to each other, competitively showering their respective neighbours Kirsten Blomfeld and Anthony Birkin with brazenly flirtatious attention. Their daughters rolled their eyes at each other while scrolling through their enormous phones. Father looked like someone had spat in his food, a permanent grimace fixed to his face at the fact he was seated between two women, even if one of them was his esteemed and equally ambitious wife. Father was a chauvinist through and through, so the company of men would be forever superior to that of the women in his life.
He caught my eye and mouthed, “Where’s Ossian?”
I glanced about with faux discretion then replied, “I’ll tell you later.”
His frown said he wasn’t satisfied with my response, but I didn’t care,
Dinner passed by in a blur, with my mind constantly pulling me back to the moment I saw Vivian in the crypt. Her face had been almost translucent with fear and embarrassment, and the memory of her soft, helpless cries clenched a fist around my heart. She’d thought Ossian was me. That gave me some hope. She left this place knowing we were over. To think she was reopening her heart and her thighs for a man she thought was me sent a cacophony of butterflies raging around my stomach. I needed to see her. I needed to make it right. I needed to reassure her this would all be over in a matter of days and that I could be hers and she could be mine.
The sound of a silver knife tapping against a crystal flute thankfully drew everyone’s eyes to the host.
I felt a tap on my shoulder. “It’s the groom’s speech, darling,” Elspeth said low. “Are you ready?”
I pressed my lips to her forehead. “Of course I am.”
I rose to my feet. I’d had a few words memorised and I let them roll off my tongue. I smiled in all the right places, I handed out gifts to the mothers and bridesmaids, and I raised a toast to my new wife. But I didn’t feel any of it. Instead, I felt restless. I was now on a clock. The idea that a future with Vivian was closer than I’d anticipated made me anxious to make it all happen now.
Hector did a sterling best man speech but it all went in one ear and out the other. Fortunately, he was a cheeky and charismatic performer, loving his moment in the spotlight and his chance to take the total piss out of me as much as the guests.
I discreetly glanced at my watch.
“Is everything okay?” Elspeth whispered, as her own father stood to give a speech.
“I’m just…” I looked at her through lowered lashes. “I’m thinking I should check on Ossian.”
She smiled weakly. “I’m sure he’s fine. Can you send someone else? What about Marcia?”
“He and Marcia had a falling out. I think he’d appreciate a visit from me, especially knowing what I’m leaving behind in order to do it.”
She nodded sympathetically. “Fine. Just don’t be too long, okay? It’s only a couple of hours until our first dance.”
I kissed her forehead again. “Thank you. I knew there was a reason I married you.”
A blush rose up through her cheeks and I felt instantly guilty. I was playing the part a little too well. If only it was Vivian sitting in that chair and not Elspeth. There would be no acting, no guilt. Only pure, unadulterated love. I wouldn’t be sitting there like a damned gentleman either. I’d have had my hand beneath her wedding gown through each course, making a decadent meal out of her with my fingers. My cock stiffened at the thought.
I sat out the applause solicited by my new father-in-law’s speech and waited for normal drunken chatter to resume, then I got to my feet.
“I won’t be long.”
Only a few pairs of eyes tracked me as I crossed the ballroom and left through the doors. The second I was free from the clutches of legacy, I broke into a run.
Vivian
I heard voices at the entrance to Minty’s flat and I clutched my arms around my core, partly to protect myself, partly to quell the shaking. I turned slowly to face the door just as Minty walked back into the room. A tall figure entered behind her and my chest stiffened.
Minty stepped to the side, her gaze flicking between me and Rupert. His blackened eyes burrowed into me, but there was no way I was going to let them penetrate my skin. Not anymore.
“I’ll leave the two of—"
“Stay.” I snapped at Minty before she could finish that sentence. After Ossian, Rupert was the last person I wanted to be in a room with. I was shame personified. Dirty. Call me a coward but I couldn’t bear to see my grimy soul reflected in his eyes. I directed my gaze at the wall.
“You should go, Rupert,” I said. “It’s your wedding day.”
“I said those vows for you.”
I sensed Minty looking sharply up at Rupert, while I focused on a hole in the wall where a picture hook had perhaps once been.
“It doesn’t count. And it doesn’t matter. You shouldn’t be here.”
