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“To warn you about the baby.”
“Baby? Salem’s baby?”
But I can’t answer him. My mouth doesn’t seem to work anymore, and my eyelids are too heavy to keep open.
* * *
The next time I open my eyes, E is gone, and in his place is Hawk. His eyes are closed, so I slowly take him in.
A cough from the doorway makes both of us jump as Creed walks into the room with a cardboard tray of cups. “You’re awake.”
I blink but don’t say anything. Instead, I fight the urge to throw myself out the window to avoid the inevitable confrontation.
“Are you in pain?”
I don’t want to show them any weakness, so I shake my head but do a lousy job of hiding my wince.
“Liar.”
Hawk reaches over and hits my pain pump before he stands, towering over me. “What are you doing here, Avery?”
I don’t know how to answer that, not yet. Everything is still too jumbled in my head.
“So, you’re going to give us the silent treatment now? Real fucking mature,” Hawk snaps.
I fist the sheets and squeeze my eyes shut, hoping they’ll take the hint and leave. But, of course, they don’t. They never do anything I want them to.
“Why did you do it?” Creed asks gently, making my eyes snap open when I realize he’s moved closer. “You could have been fucking killed. If you ever pull a stunt like that again, I’ll spank your ass so hard you won’t be able to sit for a month.”
I suck in a breath at that because he’s not lying. I narrow my eyes at him. “I couldn’t let you get shot.”
Hawk makes a noise from beside me when I finally speak, but I don’t look at him. I’m trying to do everything I can right now to not fall apart.
“Yes, you fucking can. You are never to do something so fucking idiotic again,” he roars. I look toward the window, but his hand grips my jaw, turning me to look at him. “Oh no. You do not get to shut us out. Not this time.”
“What do you want, Creed? I’m tired. I’m sorry I took a bullet for you. It won’t happen again.” Assuming that nobody shoots at him while I’m around, that is. I couldn’t stand back and do nothing. I’ve never been that person. Too many times when I was a kid, people stood and witnessed the shit I went through, and they did nothing, said nothing. Which made them just as fucking guilty as my bullies.
“I want to know why!” he shouts, making me jump and grimace again.
“I told you why. I couldn’t let you get hurt, okay?”
“Why did you leave?”
I squeeze my eyes shut, willing him to fucking go away. “I’m tired. I’d like you both to leave now.”
“You are a fucking coward, Avery. All you ever did was run and hide. I don’t know why I expected more.”
His words make vomit rush up my throat, but I swallow it down.
“You don’t know anything about me, Creed. You never did. Say what you want. It’s nothing I haven’t heard before.”
“Fuck this, let’s go.” Hawk stands and walks to the door, yanking it open before turning to look at me. “Do me a favor, Avery. Next time, stay fucking gone. Nobody wants you here.”
He stalks off as my eyes sting with unshed tears.
Creed stares down at me, his jaw clenched so hard that it looks like it hurts. “I don’t know why you did what you did. I’m not happy because you put yourself in danger doing it, but I’m still grateful.” He swallows hard before continuing. “He’s angry that you left us. It’s hard for him—seeing you like this after so long—it’s hard for both of us.” He turns away from me to look out the window. “Just tell me it was worth it. That you’re happy. Tell me that, at least.”
“I’m not sure what happy even is anymore, Creed,” I admit in a whisper as my eyes start to feel heavy once more.
