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Avery,
I’m over at the main house giving the guys a rundown of everything. I know they’ll have questions, but they can wait until you’re ready. Relax. Help yourself to anything you want. I’ve locked the doors so nobody can bother you. There is a spare key in the kitchen drawer, the third one down. I’ll try to be as quick as I can, then we can sort out that phone call for you.
Evander
I smile as I trace my fingers over the letters before reality steps in. Ev is somewhat of a conundrum for me. There is something about the man that draws me in. There has been since the first time I saw him in the hospital.
Then, for him to not just stand up for me against his family but to put himself between me and them, that’s more than I ever expected. I’ve never had that before. Not even with Hawk and Creed.
With a sigh, I walk back over to the coffee machine as it beeps and pour myself a cup before carrying it over to one of the two light gray oversized sofas. I curl up in the corner and hold the mug with both hands as I try to untangle everything.
Everything would be so much easier if I just hated Hawk and Creed. Oh, there is a part of me that is so fucking angry that it makes it hard to think about them without wanting to inflict bodily harm. But there is a part of me—that young, naive girl—that still loves the men I fell so head over heels in love with. People say you never forget your first love, even if, in the end, it turns bad. And that’s because the first touch of love leaves an imprint on your soul. Every relationship that comes after will be compared to that one. The good, the bad, and the downright ugly. And I fear I’ll always hold myself back with anyone else because of the damage they inflicted.
All those that say it’s better to have loved and lost than never have loved at all have never had their still-beating hearts ripped out of their chests. After a lifetime of feeling unworthy, I thought I’d found my happily ever after in their arms. But it was all a lie. Instead, the steps I’d taken to repair my broken self-esteem were destroyed.
Now there’s Ev. A man that I can’t have, not without ruining the life he has here. Yet I can’t stop myself from thinking about him. With another sigh, I take a sip of my coffee and resign myself to a future filled with lonely nights and lots of cats.
The sooner I deal with everything I came here to fix, the sooner I can leave again. I need to put some distance between me and the men who threaten to knock down every wall I’ve built.
I finish my coffee, feeling antsy. I could read a book, but I don’t think I can concentrate on anything right now, not knowing there is a houseful of people discussing my fate. Biting my lip, my eyes drift to the kitchen, where the spare key is, before I make a decision.
“Screw it.” I put my mug on the table and jog back to the bedroom, where my running shoes are. I slip them on and grab a sweatshirt with a picture of a melting Rubik’s cube on the front and pull it on over my head. It hits my thighs, and though I’ll probably be hot, it acts as a barrier and hides the fact that I’m not wearing a bra.
I rummage through the kitchen drawer until I find the key and let myself out, locking the door behind me out of habit. I look around and take in the other new houses on the property. I’m glad they’re not super close together. I think I’d feel claustrophobic knowing everyone was in spitting distance. I walk over to the large main building, which is the one I remember, and ignore the wild beating of my heart.
“Nobody is going to hurt me. Everything is going to be fine,” I remind myself.
I reach the set of double doors, take a deep breath, and pull them open before I can talk myself out of it. The table is full, and every head turns my way when I enter, making me freeze. Okay, turning around and running away seems super appealing right now.
“Avery? Everything okay?” Hawk walks over to me, but I flinch when he reaches for me, backing up a little.
“Avery,” he chokes as Ev appears at my side.
Ev wraps his hand around mine and leads me over to the table. I look behind me and see Hawk’s head and shoulders drop in defeat, making my stomach clench with guilt. There is nothing worse than loving someone with your whole heart and not trusting them to take care of it.
“Here, you can take my seat,” Ev offers.
“Oh no, it’s fine. I can stand.”
“Sit. I’ll move down one,” Wilder offers, getting up and moving over.
I sit in the seat Wilder just vacated and grip the edge of the chair as Ev sits beside me. The air feels thick and oppressive as I stare at the tabletop before I push the fear back and look up—directly into Crew’s eyes.
“Hey, sweetheart.”
Tears prick my eyes. “Hi,” I whisper back with a smile.
“You want a drink, Avery?” Greg asks from further down the table.
I look over and shake my head. “No, I’m fine. Thank you. I just introduced myself to Ev’s fancy coffee machine.”
He grins. “The man is a coffee snob.”
“You have the exact same machine.” Ev laughs.
“That’s how I know it’s true.”
“Alright. Can we get back to what we were talking about?” Zig quiets everyone down. “Avery, are you okay to answer some questions?”
