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“Over there,” I told him, gesturing to a small, uncomfortable Bauhaus chair by the big window. The chair was bent plywood – it was light. If things didn’t go well, I could pick it up, with Caleb still on it, and hurl them both through the window.
Well, okay, not quite. Obviously, I would never go that far. Those windows were historical artifacts and excellent examples of turn of the century art deco design, after all.
But I’d had enough. And Caleb knew it. He perched on the edge of the Bauhaus chair looking – frankly – terrified.
“Right, you have been massively taking advantage of me, and not stepping up for Maddy, and it stops now,” I said.
Caleb smirked at me and put his feet up on an original Ercol coffee table. “Hey, M-B, why don’t we just chill-“
“Don’t tell me to chill!” I roared. He actually moved backwards, even though I was all the way across the room. I didn’t want to leave the spot on the rug where Alex and I had been so intimate. I know it sounds silly, but it was that connection between us that was giving me strength, and like he was still supporting me, with me, like he had my back.
And then – he was.
Footsteps on the polished floorboards of the hallway became the figure of Alex, striding across the room to me.
“Having some trouble here, ma’am?”
My eyes flashed at him almost as fiercely as they had at Caleb, and he reeled back a little too. “No,” I said, gazing into his eyes.
He flickered a look at the spot on the rug I was standing on. That connection jumped between us. That understanding. For a moment it was only the two of us, and our love.
“If anyone needs help here, it’s me,” said Caleb. Wrecking the moment.
I was about to give it to him with both barrels, like I had with Dad, but then exhaustion washed over me in a huge wave. Not just from hardly sleeping for a couple nights. From two years of having Caleb in my life. From losing Alex. From hurting Kayla. From folding my business. From my useless, egotistical father. From raising Maddy on my own. From juggling so much and putting a brave face and a positive spin on things all the time.
Suddenly, I’d had enough - deeply truly enough.
That was the moment Caleb chose to say, “Have you put on weight, M-B? I guess it’s easy to let yourself go after having kids.”
Alex bristled beside me.
I wanted to fire a witty, fuck you line at Caleb, but it was the final straw and I burst into tears.
“Grow up, be a man and start being a decent father. And respect the mother of your child. She knows what Maddy needs – which right now is routine, stability and nurturing activities. Do it – she’ll be logging your behavior from now on. So, step up, unless you want restricted access down the line.”
Caleb just looked shocked, mouth hanging open. “Hey, man, I don’t want no-,“ he began, but Alex cut him off.
“And Caleb-”
“Yeah?”
“Get the fuck out of my building, before I throw you out.”
Well, he didn’t need telling twice. The moment he left, Alex turned towards me, his arms held out, and I collapsed into them. He held me tight and stroked my hair back from my face. I wanted to kiss him, and I wondered if he wanted to kiss me too.
But he didn’t.
He led me to the orange sofa after a while and sat me down. “You okay?” he asked.
“Yeah, thanks for being here.”
“I was in the hall and I heard yelling and…” he smiled and shook his head. “I just felt so protective of you – I guess that’s the alpha male idiot coming out in me again, wanting to fix things for you.”
We smiled at one another, and I knew we were both remembering back to the park, when I’d dealt with that asshole apartment leasing agent, and Alex had resisted getting involved.
“You realize you did that whole thing with a burp cloth over your shoulder, right?” I reached over to pull it off and resisted the urge to stroke his cheek.
He laughed. “Huh. I did not realize that. No.”
