Page 37 of How to Lose a Lass


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She jumps out of her chair and insists on pulling the covers back for me. Then the woman I adore casually strips and climbs onto the bed. I struggle to get undressed. My exhaustion makes it a lot more difficult, but eventually, I'm naked. So, I crawl onto the bed to lie down beside her.

I must've fallen asleep instantly, because the next thing I know, it's morning and I'm alone in bed. For a few seconds, I think Jamie must have snuck out in the middle of the night and gone back to Scotland. But then I hear sizzling sounds coming from the kitchen. I haven't opened my eyes yet. Jamie is humming a melodic tune, and I just lie here for a while listening to her. After a few minutes, her humming turns into singing as she softly croons a pretty tune that I know I've heard before, though I can't remember the name of it. Probably something Scottish. Jamie loves the traditional songs.

But I've never heard her sing before. She has a beautiful voice.

I drag my butt out of bed and get dressed. Jamie smiles when she realizes I'm up and awake, but she doesn't stop singing. Good. I want to hear more of her voice. I walk up to the kitchen island, which is more like an islet considering the mini size of everything in this apartment. There's only one stool at the island, but I pull that up to the counter and rest my arms on it, enjoying the serenade from a hot Scottish lass.

Jamie raises onto her tiptoes to lean across the islet and kiss me. "Madainn mhath, Gavin. That means good morning."

"Good morning to you too, Jamie. Are you starting me on a Gaelic language course?"

"Not officially. But I would love to teach you, if you're interested."

"Sure, sounds like fun. The only language I really know is English---the American version. I took Spanish in high school, since it was required, but I don't remember any of it these days."

Jamie slants across the counter to kiss me again. "Once I teach you Gaelic, you'll never forget it."

"I'm sure you're right. By the way, what was that song you were singing?"

"The Elfin Knight."

"Are you serious? Scots have a song about an elf who's a knight too? That doesn't sound like anything your brothers would sing about. Can't picture Lachlan riding an elf horse. He'd break its little back."

Jamie raises a spatula, aiming it at me. "Dinnae be sarcastic about a traditional folk song. Scots love The Elfin Knight. It's about a lass who is sitting on a hill when she hears the blare of an elf knight's horn and wishes he would come to her bedroom."

"A spicy Scottish folk song? I'm starting to like this. Tell me the rest."

"Dinnae remember the whole story. But I do recall that the elfin knight shows up in her bed chamber and makes some sort of deal with her that results in the lass marrying the knight. She performs tasks for him, though I can't remember the details offhand."

"So, he blows his horn to attract a girl, then screws her and gets her to do stuff for him. Do they live happily ever after?"

Jamie shrugs. "I reckon so."

"Damn, Scots are so weird."

"In the oldest version of the ballad, the lass has no choice in the matter. The elfin knight plans to defile her without her consent. I prefer the later version because the lass isn't a victim in that story."

"Yeah, I wouldn't like the older version either."

Jamie sets two plates on the island. "Let's eat."

I jump off the stool as she comes around to my side. Though she tries to push me back onto the stool, I'm bigger and can easily overwhelm her. I don't need to do that, however. She relents and sets her sexy little ass on the stool. I jump up to sit on the countertop.

We talk about that song some more, making jokes about it and generally enjoying ourselves. I hadn't realized how lonely I was until Jamie turned up last night. We talk on the phone a lot, but that's not the same thing as being together in person, in the same place. I've missed the hell out of her. Not sure how much longer I can stand to be away from her, but I can't ask Jamie to move to America for me. The MacTaggarts are all very close, especially Jamie and her brothers and sisters. Now that my sister lives in Scotland too, maybe I should move there.

To another country? Where the people speak so differently? I feel anxious just thinking about that.

Sure, I know Scots basically speak the same language as Brits and Americans. But they have strange slang, and there's the whole Gaelic issue. Jamie taught me some dirty Gaelic, but that won't help me in everyday life. I meant it when I said I'd love to learn the language. I'd probably suck at it, though. Despite learning Spanish in high school, the only phrase I remember is "buenos dias." I think that means "good morning."

If I can't assimilate with the MacTaggarts...will Jamie dump me?

The lass in question raises one hand to touch my cheek. "What's fashing you, Gavin?"

Another Scottish word---"fash." I know that asking what's fashing me means she wants to know what's wrong, but hearing that term only brought home the reality of the language difference. Am I being a dick and a dope? Should I fall to one knee and beg her to marry me, damn the consequences? That's what I've wanted to do since the day we met.

"Well, Gav? What's fashing you? I'm asking---"

"I know what you're asking. What's bothering me is that when I think about us, I flash back to the day I met Aidan. He wasn't thrilled to find out that I was attracted to his sister." I down a mouthful of coffee a little too fast, making me cough. Jamie sits there serenely waiting for me to speak again. "I'm starting to feel like I'm the elfin knight who's trying to whisk you away from your family so I can do naughty things to you."

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