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I stood my ground because if I didn’t, he might think I was affected by him when that wasn’t true. It was worse! But it was also one night, and as much as I wanted to believe in the fairy tale of it all, I was way too practical. I barely knew him even though looking at him right now made me feel like he was a part of my life forever. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes, you do, and I’d prefer it if you didn’t piss me off while we—”
“While we what?” I snapped. “What the hell is that supposed to mean? There is no we.” He made sure of that when he shooed me away like a lost puppy licking the ground he walked on for the smallest fucking crumb of approval.
He got even closer, and I was mesmerized by the intensity on his features that I didn’t see him lift his arm until I felt the comfort of his finger trailing down the side of my face. “While we get to know each other.”
My throat got itchy, and my eyes stung. He was toying with me now. Getting to know each other was just code for while we have sex but I buy you food first so you don’t feel like a slut. “No.”
“No?” He squinted. “Can I ask why not?”
“Because I won’t let you.”
“Why is that?”
I couldn’t help it. My eyes got wet. I wanted to believe him, but if I did that, and things went bad, I could lose Bristol. She was the only friend I had, and I cherished her so much that losing out on the possibility of love was a risk I was willing to take in order to keep her friendship. And a part of me was still traumatized by the last guy I met for a date who punched me in the face when I wouldn’t put out. I wasn’t afraid of Scotty in that way, but I was still terrified. “It was a mistake, Scotty. The night was all romantic, and we’d been drinking, and it never should have happened. I’m sorry if I made you think differently.”
There. A logical explanation. Maybe he’d believe it because I sure didn’t. No matter how many excuses I used or lies I told, it wasn’t a mistake. It was magnificent.
“I disagree. I don’t think it was a mistake, but you’re worth the wait, so I’ll be here as long as it takes to prove it to you.” His eyes went to my sliding door. “How many cats do you have? Are there four of them in there?”
He sounded so sincere, but he wasn’t listening, and I wanted to scream. Why was he doing this? What was the point? And what kind of fool was I for wanting to push him away when I knew he was a good guy, and I was so attracted to him it made my heart skip a beat?
Because he’d go away. He’d betray me. Hurt me. Again. He’d do what every other man on the planet did, and I couldn’t go through it once more, especially not with him. “Why?”
“What happened that night, all of it?” He didn’t need me to acknowledge it because there was no denying something occurred. “Attraction is too tame a word. It was more like… an awareness, the answer to a question I never thought to ask. It was all-consuming. That’s never happened to me. Has it to you?”
I shook my head even though I should have continued fighting him.
“Right. So if you think I’m going to let something that precious slip through my fingers, you’re sorely mistaken. It wasn’t dumb luck that put me here. It was fate or destiny or whatever you want to call it. I don’t know about you, but I’ve had enough shit in my life to know that when something good is close enough to touch, I’m gonna grab it and hold on.”
Precious.
I’ve never in my life been called precious, and I loved how light it made my body feel, like I was levitating. Even more so now, I needed him to give up. I simultaneously wanted to never see his face again and look at it every day until I died. He made me feel things I never had, and I didn’t want the inevitable to ruin what could potentially take the place of the coffee mug.
“Sure, there was something, then we acted on it, which wasn’t smart.” I powered through with the intention of ending this charade. He’d figure out how damaged I was, and he’d be disgusted, and then break my heart into a million pieces. “I know you’re Bristol’s friend. I know what you did for her, so I know you’re a good guy. But this”—I motioned back and forth between us—“isn’t going to happen. Not again.”
“It’s not?”
“No. We can forget anything happened between us and move past it and be friends for Bristol’s sake.”
He ran his fingers through that sexy-as-hell hair of his and snickered, and a tingle shot off low in my belly and settled deep in my core. “All right, sugar, if that’s what you want.”
CHAPTER 4
Scotty
“Great…” She glanced at her bare feet, then raised her eyes to meet mine. “Friends it is, then.”
If I wasn’t mistaken, she seemed disappointed that I agreed to her ridiculous proposition, but if that was what she needed to be comfortable with me, I’d concede to just about anything. I grew up watching my mom live in fear, and Paris had that same look in her eyes, but behind the guarded mistrust, there was hope. The last thing on earth I wanted to do was make Paris afraid of me. I wanted her to trust me and feel safe with me, so we’d go at her pace.
I was shocked at how vehement she was that it was a mistake, but that just meant that I had to work that much harder to prove that she was worth the wait.
“All right, friend.” I took a step toward my place. “I’ll leave you to your coffee. You know where I live if you need anything.”
“Same.”
“Have a good day, Paris.”
