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“You seem entirely too excited about the idea that she was,” I teased.
“When you’re with a woman as strong and sharp as Lana, sometimes it’s nice to know that she would be crushed without you,” he said. “Call me terrible if you like, but I’m an insecure fucker who’s obsessed with his girlfriend.”
I deflated. “You and me both.”
Travis studied me for a moment. “Look, Cole, I don’t mean to pry, but...” he trailed off, hesitating.
“What is it, Trav?” I asked, suddenly on guard.
“You and Marley have been through a lot together. I don’t know what you guys got into it about, but it seems pretty intense. Maybe you should try to understand her better. Try to see things from her perspective.”
I looked away, rubbing my temples. “I’m trying, Travis. I swear I am. It’s just...she wants to become a shifter. She thinks it’s the only way to truly be with me. And I don’t agree.”
Travis nodded. “You can’t fault her for wanting to be true to herself, especially not when you love her. Not with how much she loves you.”
“No,” I agreed. “I suppose I can’t. But she’s already at risk because she’s been bitten before, and look at how your second dose turned out. Travis, how am I supposed to tell my mate ‘sure, go ahead, risk your life’ when everything in my biology makes it so I want to tear people apart who dare try and hurt her?”
We sat in companionable silence for a few moments. “Listen, Cole,” Travis began gently. “Have you asked her why she wants to become a shifter?”
“I already know,” I said.
“Okay, but do you really know, or do you only know in that way you know things when you won’t let people get a word in edgewise because you think you know best?” Travis’s tone was wry and knowing.
“It’s complicated,” I replied, avoiding his eyes. “But then, most things involving me tend to be.”
The corners of Travis’s mouth twitched upward in a slight smile. “That’s right. And if anyone knows that, it’s definitely you. The two of you need to sit down and actually talk instead of you just assuming you’ve got everything figured out.”
I rolled my eyes. “Don’t patronize me.”
“But it’s so fun to do,” he joked, then yawned. “Shit, all I’ve done is sleep, and I’m fucking exhausted. I guess I just don’t really understand what has you so worked up about this whole thing. When I told you I was going to transition. you didn’t even bat an eye.” He settled back against the pillows behind him. “You didn’t ask any questions or express any fear or uncertainty. You just said okay. So what’s the difference? Why are you so against Marley doing the same thing?”
Travis pressed on, arching an eyebrow at me. “If you love her enough to protect her with everything you have, then surely you must believe she’s capable of making her own decisions about her own body?”
My jaw clenched as I balled my hands into fists. “I do trust her,” I whispered. “It’s just...the dangers. The risks. What if something goes wrong? What if she dies?”
“Cole, you’ve never been one to live your life based on what may or may not happen,” Travis said. “Don’t start doing that now. I mean, what happened in the argument? If you’re such a mess over it, I take it that it didn’t go well.”
“She told me that she wasn’t sure if she wanted to transition, but if she does make the decision, she expects me to support her through it. And that if I don’t, she doesn’t know what we’re doing together. She gave me an ultimatum.” My voice sounded distant, even to my own ears. “Basically, if I don’t support her, she doesn’t see the point of us being together.”
“Jesus Christ,” Travis muttered, his eyes wide. “I thought it was bad when I was dying earlier, but that takes the damn cake.”
I rubbed my temples as a headache started to bloom. “I don’t want to lose her. I love her, Travis. I can’t imagine my future without her in it. But it feels like every time I turn around, there’s another hurdle in our path. Another challenge to overcome.”
“Love isn’t easy, Cole,” Travis replied softly. “Sometimes it means sacrificing parts of yourself or accepting that the person you care about might not always make choices you agree with. That they might surprise you and shock you and push you to your breaking point.”
“We aren’t talking about a cross-country move or a burgeoning desire to become a professional dominatrix, Travis. This could fucking kill her. This could kill her, and she and you both seem to think that I should just be fine with that!”
“I’m not telling you to be fine with it,” Travis said. “I’m telling you to trust your partner and the decisions she makes for herself. Because let me tell you something, dude, sometimes it fucking sucks to be a human surrounded by shifters. It’s a really lonely fucking existence, and with me transitioning, Marley’s about to be the only human in our entire group of friends. Why wouldn’t she want to transition?”
“That’s a bullshit reason to want to transition,” I muttered.
“Oh, fuck you. Who made you the arbiter of transitioning? Be honest—is there any acceptable reason not for her to become a shifter?”
“No,” I admitted reluctantly. “There isn’t.”
“Then stop being so goddamned stubborn and talk to her,” Travis suggested. “Let her explain why this is so important to her. Maybe then you’ll finally understand where she’s coming from.”
“Fine,” I muttered. “You’re right. I’ll talk to her. “
