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“Um, I’m fine…” I trail off. “But about work. I have something I need to tell you.”
“Oh? This sounds serious. I hope everything’s okay.”
“It is. I mean, sort of. The thing is…” I take a deep breath. “Well, actually, Mom, the thing is, I haven’t been telling you the truth. I’m not at a training program in Indianapolis.”
“No?”
“No. I’m actually in Ironwood.”
There’s a short silence. Then:
“I know, honey.”
“What?” I sit up in my chair. “You know? How?”
“A mother knows, Rory. A mother’s bond with a child is unbreakable.”
“How is this possible? How could you know where I am?”
When I was a kid, Mom always seemed to know when I was lying, butthis?
She giggles. “Well. Maybe it’s time for me to come clean myself. I did know you were in Ironwood. But that’s because technology told me. Remember when I was sick, and you and I shared the Where’s My Phone app so you wouldn’t worry about me? Well, it’s still on your phone, sweetie.”
“Oh, my god,” I put a hand to my forehead. “So you’ve known I was lying to you this whole time? Why didn’t you say something?”
“Well, not the whole time. But yes, I think it’s fair to say I’ve known for a while.”
I let out a dejected sigh. “Well, since that’s the case, I guess it’s about time you learn why I’m here.”
I tell her everything. About how Dad asked me to come down for a visit. About how when I got here, he roped me into working for him. About Dad’s illness, and his recent hospitalization. About how I feel like right now, I can’t leave him. About how ambivalent I am about the job at his company but it doesn’t seem like now is the time to tell him that.
“And there’s something else.” I pause. “I ran into Brody.”
“Oh?” I hear the phone shift in her hand. “And how was that?”
“It’s…” I squeeze my eyes shut. “Ugh, it’s complicated. He hated me at first. He was furious that I was back in town. And then we kept running into each other. And I don’t know, eventually he just started seeming to hate me less. And I guess now we’re friends? Sort of?” I shake my head. “No. It’s more than that. Oh, Mom, I don’t know what to think!” My voice rises to a wail. “I’m happy he doesn’t hate me anymore, but I almost wish I’d never seen him again. It’s painful, you know? I thought I was over us, but now, seeing him around, knowing he’s here, I wish… I wish…”
“You wish you were back together,” she finishes for me. “Well, is that a possibility?”
“I don’t know! A few days ago, I almost thought maybe, but now…”
I stop myself, not sure how to continue. I don’t want to talk to my mom about everything I told Brody. She doesn’t know the real truth of what happened years ago. I know I should tell her, and I think I will. But not over the phone.
“Dad had an attack and went into the hospital a few days ago,” I say instead. “Brody helped me with getting him home, and I thought maybe we had turned a corner. But I haven’t seen him since. I don’t know what to think.”
“Maybe Brody just needs some time to process,” she says gently. “You showed up in his life after all this time and he wasn’t expecting it. Give him a little bit to catch his breath.”
“I don’t know, Mom. Maybe it really is too late.”
As I say the words, I realize for the first time how much I don’t want them to be true.
“My baby girl,” she soothes. “Listen to me. Your father and I should never have gotten married. We weren’t meant to be. I’d say I regret it, but I don’t. Because I have you. I realized a long time ago that was the meaning of why I was with him.
“Now, I’m better off by myself. Maybe I’ll find someone in the future, maybe not. I’m at peace with it either way. But you, on the other hand, you were always meant to be with that boy.” She sighs. “I always felt sad for the two of you that you didn’t meet each other later in life. Once you’d lived a little. But it was always clear he was the one for you, and you for him.”
“I don’t know, Mom.”
“Trust me,” she replies. “More importantly, learn to trust yourself.”
