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“I remember that trip.”
“I looked at it, and Iknew.” She coughs as if fighting away tears. “I knew right away that I wanted you. I fell for you right then. It’s crazy. Even my best friend Rachael thinks I’m nuts, but I can’t help it. I tried to pretend these feelings weren’t happening, but then I saw you in the bar. I told myself it was for revenge. That was my excuse, but truthfully, I just wanted to be near you.”
I lean in, kissing her passionately and hard so I don’t have to think about the guilt, doubt, or pain. Just this moment, not midnight, not my son. Just my woman and all the affection bursting out of her.
When the kiss starts to get steamy, I know I won’t be able to stop. If I let it go much longer, even a few more seconds, I won’t be able to hold myself back. My balls are full of seed, desperate to surge up my shaft and erupt inside her, claiming her body, future, and life together. When I gently push her off my lap, she frowns.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, gripping the table’s edge. “It’s just…”
“I know,” she replies, nodding. “It’s okay. I understand.”
“Do you think the guilt will ever stop?” I ask.
She shrugs. “This is all new to me. I’ve never felt this way about anybody. I’m not even sureanybodyfeels like this, honestly. I saw a photo, and I knew.”
“I saw you once in a bar, andIknew. I don’t care if other people never experience this. If anything, it makes it more special for us.”
She smiles briefly, then returns to her chair, sitting opposite. “So you really want a family together?”
“Did you think I was lying?” I counter.
“No, but I have to be sure before I let myself hope. This is just so surreal. I thought… I don’t know. Maybe I was losing my mind. Or maybe I was a late bloomer, and this was a crush, but it never felt like a crush. It always felt more serious than that.”
“That’s because it is,” I growl. “I meant what I said. You’remine. Your body. Your future. Your womb. Everything.Mine.”
“And you’re mine too, right?”
I nod, but I don’t reach across the table. I stop myself from touching her because then I’ll snap, lose control, glide my hands all over her body, and take complete control of her. I won’t be able to stop myself, but that has to come later when we have Ryan’s blessing.
“Duke?” she says when I don’t answer.
“I’m yours,” I tell her fiercely. “I don’t want anybody else. I’ve never wanted anybody else. Hell, Molly, I feel like I’ve been waiting for you.”
“Me too,” she replies. “Maybe that’s why I was never interested in boys. Maybe that’s why I had to force myself to be with…”
She trails off. She doesn’t need to say his name for me to know she’s talking about my son. My son, who could be tortured or killed as I experience the most intimate moment of my life.
I focus on my plate, cutting my food, wishing this moment could bejustgood with no hint of shame or dread.
* * *
After dinner, we sit on the couch, no TV, waiting for Ethan to reach out. Four hours until I’m due to meet the goons. I wrap my arm over her shoulder, holding her gently, trying to ignore the savage impulses pumping inside me.
Now I know she wants the same. It’s so difficult to hold back, even when I know I’ll be going to battle soon, whatever shape it takes. Soon, it’ll be time for the gang’ssurprise, whatever the hell that means. Maybe I’ll regret not taking my woman when I had the chance. But if I claim her fully and take her virginity, which ismineto take, and Ryan finds out… Or worse, something happens to him, and I never get his blessing…
“Are you okay?” she whispers, looking up at me.
I kiss her forehead, holding her more intimately. “Yeah. Just thinking about later and…” She stares wide-eyed, waiting for me to go on. “And you,” I growl. “I can’t stop thinking about that little thing we have to do if we’re going to have a family.”
Any time I reference our need, it’s like I’m waiting for her to tell me she was joking or I somehow got it wrong. The worst would be if she revealed that even this aspect ofuswas part of her revenge plan. Instead, she leans up and finds my lips. She kisses me so damn hotly, moaning as if she’s letting go, shivering against me.
I groan, grabbing her leg and feeling her thickness, but then I end the kiss.
“What’s wrong?” she asks, then frowns. “Sorry, silly question.”
“We can’t go all the way until…” I swallow. It will never feel normal to reference my son while being intimate with my woman, referencing herex. “Ryan is safe. Until he knows that we’re long term, and he accepts it.”
She swallows. “And what if he doesn’t?”
