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CHAPTER 1
Kimberly
It will get easier hunny, trust me, this pain won’t last forever. My mother’s voice echoed through my mind as I held a photograph of my wedding day, our wedding day. Luke beamed with glee, wearing the brightest and widest smile I had ever seen, and it was all for me, as we stood under the altar in our families church. The church he begged me to marry him in and now, I couldn’t even step foot in.
I went through and put the last of his things away, and all the grief and pain of his death had been brought back to the forefront. I tried to hold myself together, to not cry, but tears still escaped. Placing the photograph back into our wedding album and sticking it gently in a box, his favorite winter scarf caught my eye and as I held it up, his scent, his aftershave, came flooding into my senses.
He always smelt of a warm fire on a winter’s night. We only had a short marriage before God stepped in and took him from me, just shy of our fourth wedding anniversary. I thought we’d beaten the odds, he wasn’t going to be a part of the statistics and it wasn’t even the dreaded 'C' that got him in the end, it was the blood clot they missed in his heart.
I was grateful in some ways he went quick, asleep on the operating table and not awake in pain. We even had a lovely day together the day before his operation, which I will never forget. Did I regret not telling him I loved him that night? Did I even say it that day? I couldn’t remember, it had been a year since and only now had I found some strength to put his things away and head back to work. I need to find who I was without him. Without him.
Putting everything back into the box, I taped it shut and as much as it pained me, I took it down to the garage. The box was placed on one of the shelves, along with the other keepsakes. I had already donated his clothes and books to people in need, but I couldn’t fully part with everything.
Looking at my watch, I noticed it was just past eight in the morning. It was my first day back at work. I had to leave soon if I am to prove to everyone I am doing alright, perfectly fine, even if deep down I'm not. And yet, a brave mask went on as I knew the excuse of ‘my husband died’ was wearing thin.
“Be good, Daisy, I won’t be long.”
Bending down to touch noses with my beautiful fluffy companion, I gave her head a rub. I grabbed my keys, my ice-skates and bag, before I headed out the door. I was to coach some new recruits, prepare them for the figure skating regionals and hopefully go onto nationals.
Getting back into the rhythm of work was going to take some getting used to and as much as I wanted to stay home and lie in bed, in my grief, I had young teenagers to train. A group of adolescents who had passed their child examinations and were now making their way up the ranks.
I had stopped listening to music since Luke’s death, but I knew as soon as I entered the ice rink there would be music blasting from the speakers and I just had to ignore it. He was such a big music lover, every morning he had to have the radio playing, or some playlist he had conjured up the night before, but now it just brought me heartache. Which was a little silly, as he had always said, music can help with all sorts of emotions.
The rink was quiet this morning, aside from the Zamboni making its way across the ice and the staff bustling about. They were cleaning up the spectator chairs from the night before as well as opening the café and ice skate rental stall. I had to head to Rachel’s office once I arrived, to get a briefing of any changes that had happened while I was on leave, and I dreaded the questions I knew that were going to be fired at me.
Knocking on her door before opening it, I saw she was already in a meeting with someone but before I could escape, she spotted me.
“Oh, Kimberly, lovely to see you, please, come in.”
“I don’t mind waiting outside.”
“That’s alright, we were just finishing up. This is Samuel, he’s on leave with his eh - work and has offered to coach the new children’s ice hockey team.”
He stood up and I realized I hadn't noticed how much his broad shoulders filled the small office chair. I wouldn’t have guessed that he was as tall as he appeared to be, standing at least six foot three. God like, was all I could think looking at his sunkissed brown skin, unkempt brown hair and green eyes that were set upon me.
Samuel Jones, captain of the Vancouver Devils, the boy who had stolen my heart back in high school was now standing in front of me after nearly ten years of only seeing him on television screens and news articles.
“It’s lovely to see you again, Kimmy.”
My heart stopped in my chest as I felt a bead of sweat run down my back. It felt like time hadn't moved since junior high, he hadn't changed a bit, other than grown more into himself and definitely more handsome than when he was a pimple-nosed teen.
“Ah, you guys know each other?” Rachel stepped in.
“Yeah, me and Kim go way back!” Exclaimed Samuel with a smile on his face.
“We, eh, we went to junior high together, and we had a few classes together, I think.”
A small lie, but Rachel didn’t need to know our full history and I was hoping Samuel caught my drift. I didn’t like sharing all my business with my boss, only the things she needed to know, and these things had happened in the past, way deep in the past.
“Lovely, well Sam, Kimberly is our figure skating coach, so I’m sure you will be seeing plenty of each other during lessons. Kim starts training our newest team today, after taking a long leave of absence.”
“Yeah, I heard about your husband, I’m sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you.”
How did he hear about that? He was off being some super famous ice hockey player. Perhaps he was being kept in the loop by his parents; they still lived in the same house on Wicker Street, after all. There was an awkward silence that settled in the air before Samuel realized it was time for him to take his leave - in order for Rachel and me to get on with our own meeting.
“Well, it was nice seeing you Kim, and Rachel, thanks for this. After my injury, my manager advised me to get some rest, so I will be missing out on this winter season and as this place gave birth to my career, it’s only fair I offer to help others.”
