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“Do you think you will ever start dating again?” she asked me.
“Eh – Maybe, I mean, I don’t know, it still feels too soon.”
“It’s been a year. Actually if we want to count it, fifteen months in fact Kim, and time heals all wounds. I’m not suggesting you just jump right into bed with someone, but go on a couple of dates, test the waters, you know. The pain won’t last forever.”
“My mom told me that and I know it won’t be like this for years to come, but right now, it’s still pretty raw.”
“Well yeah, of course it is, but I know you will get through this. You’re already doing so well, look at you back to work and you even came outside!”
She joked just as the bell above the café door rang. I knew it was him, even without looking. Daisy’s ears went up and the look in Crystal’s eyes gave it away. He was invading my space and I hated it.
“Evening, ladies,” his voice, although friendly, a hint of flirting was hiding in it. “Can I sit anywhere?” Samuel directed his question to Crystal, who smiled her best hostess smile.
“Sure, let me grab you a menu.”
She headed to the counter and waited for Samuel to take a seat on one of the counter stools before handing him the menu, patiently waiting for him to order something as I stared at his back.
“I’ll have a cup of coffee and a slice of the pumpkin pie, please.”
“Coming right up!”
I got the sense that Crystal was just happy a customer had come in, since the weather had become colder it was harder to get folks through the door. Unless it was quiz night or another event.
“So, come here as well do you?” He spun on his stool to face me and I quickly lowered my eyes. “First the rink and now here, aren’t I lucky.”
“It’s a small town, you bump into all sorts here.” I replied, drinking my coffee as Daisy stood up and placed her head on my lap.
“Is she yours?”
“Eh yeah, this is Daisy.”
“German Shepherd, right?”
I nodded, rubbing behind Daisy’s ear, begging Crystal to hurry up as I didn’t fancy small talk. I just wanted to leave now, my comfort space was broken as soon as he arrived.
“Well, I best be off.”
I said as I stood and started to put my coat on, just as Crystal reappeared. She placed Samuel’s pie and coffee down in front of him and then caught sight of me and her eyes dropped. She didn’t seem too happy with me suddenly leaving, but I was all peopled out for the day and just wanted my bed, a glass of red and something silly to watch on the television.
“Crys, I will text you later, thanks for the coffee.”
“Alright, babes, get home safe.”
We waved to each other and I left as quickly as I could, to stop any more conversations that I knew we may have had if I stuck around. They could catch up, that is if Samuel remembered Crystal, which was doubtful.
Opening the passenger door of my truck, Daisy jumped in knowing it was time to go home, to the comfort of my bed where I would fall asleep from the exhaustion of just existing. Luke would have been proud of me, for getting out of bed today and trying to put one foot in front of the other, no matter how difficult it was.
Once home, I texted Crystal to say I got home safely then decided I needed to hear my mom’s voice. It had been a few days since we had a chat and I needed to talk to her.
“Hi, baby girl, are you ok?”
Instantly the wave of anxiety I had been fighting off fell from my shoulders, mom’s voice working quickly. She didn’t even have to say anything special.
“Hi, mom, I’m alright, I had my first day back at work today.”
Filling up Daisy’s food bowl and pouring myself a glass of wine as I held the phone between my ear and shoulder had become such a habit. I had always seemed to do a million things while on the phone and it always made Luke laugh. I would get myself so tangled carrying things while still trying to continue a conversation.
“Oh, well done! How did it go?”
