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“I was just checking my legs for bug bites,” Miles lied.
“Bug bites?”
“Yeah, my legs are pretty itchy, so I thought maybe mosquitos or something had bitten me.”
Miles wanted to kill himself. What the hell was he saying?
“Oh.” Beckett went quiet for a moment. “I could help you, if you want?”
“Uh, that’s okay,” Miles squeaked.
“Right, sorry, that was weird. I have no idea why I offered—”
“No, no, it’s nice you offered. It’s just that, um—” Miles said.
“…so please ignore what I said—”
“…it’s just that I remember how you reacted when you saw me earlier today—”
“…and I’ll leave you be,” Beckett finished.
“…and I don’t want to put you through that again,” Miles said.
Ten seconds of excruciating silence passed.
“I hope I didn’t hurt your feelings,” Beckett said. “In the shower… I was taken off guard.”
“I get it.”
“It wasn’t anything to do with your body.”
“I know.”
“I’m serious. Your body is…” Beckett sucked in a breath, “very attractive, so…”
Miles’s face cracked into a grin. “Beckett, you don’t need to flatter me. It’s all good.”
“Right.” Beckett stood up, suddenly towering over the tent. God, he was tall. “Goodnight, then.”
“Goodnight Beckett.”
After Beckett disappeared into his tent, Miles zipped up his plastic door and lay back on his makeshift bed. For a couple minutes, he stared at the darkness and listened to the tree leaves rustle around him.
He slipped a hand up the front of his pajamas. Pressed his palm over his stomach. Closed his eyes. Tried to think of something to distract him.
When Beckett was talking to him earlier, crouched down and leaning forward, the top of his pajama shirt gaped open. Miles had seen his cleavage. His pecs. His nipples.
Miles shook his head. He couldn’t think about that.
His brain was just running off of habit. Most nights before he fell asleep, his thoughts veered to the sexual side. In fact, most nights, he wanked before sleeping.
Miles took his hand off his stomach, turned onto his side and forced himself to think mundane thoughts. It’d been a long day, with a lot of swimming and walking. He should be exhausted, but instead all he could focus on was the howling wind and how he was so cold, his fingers and toes had started to ache.
Go to sleep.
Sleep.
Sleep now.
