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I am over my minor meltdown. Getting drunk with gay boyfriends helped. I took a couple of days off but then felt stupid. I mooched around my apartment, started watching films only to get bored or annoyed by the characters. I pressed play on ‘Pride and Prejudice,’ then instantly hit stop. Yuck yuck yuck. I threw down the remote in disgust vowing to sign up to be a nun. That’s my plan.
I browsed the internet and searched What to do when your grumpy boss turns out to be your teen sweetheart/ love of your blinkin life? Nothing useful came up. But there were some self-help sites offering ways to cleanse and reprogram your synapses. Because, after all, we are only a collection of chemicals jiggling around responding to electrical impulses. And that’s all love is: an electrical stimulus to the brain.
All I need to do is rewire my mind. Repeat some daily mantras. Come up with positive affirmations that would reroute my out-of-alignment, off-balance brain. Like tinkering with a mechanical engine, I could retune my emotional system to not be in love with Gianni. Easy. I can do that. Where’s the manual?
Chapter 8
Gianni
“Howdoyouknowthat I will love New York, Papa?” Luisa says as the plane touches down and is taxis to the arrival gate. The seatbelt sign is still on, although passengers are flicking buckles free and starting to gather their things in preparation to exit.
“Because, my darling, you are ready to experience a wider world than we have to offer in Firenze or Florence, as they call it here.”
Luisa and I had talked at length about her coming to school in New York. She was excited and thought it was a great idea when we looked at the website of the private girls’ boarding school I had in mind. Luisa passed all the entry exams without a hitch and aced the interview with the head teacher. But now we had arrived, Luisa was understandably apprehensive about her new life away from Italy.
“I’ll miss my friends,” she says looking out of the airplane window.
“You will make new friends.”
“I miss Nonna.”
“You will get a new Nonna.”
“What?”
“No. I am joking. There is only one Nonna. There is no other, thank heaven.”
“Papa. You are so mean.”
Luisa holds my hand as we make our way through VIP baggage collection and immigration. A uniformed driver is waiting for us with my name printed on a card. He greets us and takes the trolley which is loaded up with Luisa’s baggage.
“And we are going to live happily ever after, together forever in New York,” Luisa says clambering into the backseat of the car ahead of me.
“Well yes. Probably. We can have fun exploring the city together for about a week before you start your new school and I have to be back at work.”
Luisa falls silent and slumps back in the black leather seat, her arms crossed.
“Luisa. My heart. My darling. You are going to have the best time without your boring old papa. Then, you will come home for Christmas and I’m going to have the biggest, best present waiting for you.”
“Oh yeah, what? What are you going to get me?”
Luisa leans over and snuggles into my side. I put my arm around her. I can’t believe that I am going to leave the most important person in my life with strangers. But Portishead School for Girls is one of the world’s top high schools. It offers a varied curriculum heavy on science and technology. I just know Luisa is going to excel in the school’s environment. It is truly international, which is important. I am confident I am giving her the best start in life. I would be here some of the time so we would get to spend some weekends together.
Since taking on the gallery, I decided that I need to spend more time here than in Firenze. So, I researched schools and discovered girls’ boarding school has all the amenities necessary for Luisa’s education. She was getting bored at home anyway and here; her English is guaranteed to improve. She’ll be way more fluent than me. And she will have classmates and new friends in her league. She is bright. She is imaginative. She is a handful. And I love her as if she is my own child. I always have.
Luisa arrived at our family home when she was a baby. Her mother, one of my father’s employees, couldn’t care for her and was having a hard time. Being with us was only meant to be temporary until she found suitable parents to adopt little Luisa. But the more time she was in our care, the closer we became.
After my injury, I was housebound at my family home. It was a dark time for me. My soccer career was over, and I was lost. But then, this super cute little happy baby arrived and needed me. She melted my heart. She made me laugh. She made me play. Having Luisa around took my mind off my injury and gave me new purpose. I couldn’t let anyone else take her away. And when Luisa reached for me and called me Papa, that was it. I put my hand up to be her legal parent and signed the papers. Luisa is my daughter. I love her and want only the best for her.
And my parents adore her too. Mama was crying so hard at the airport when we left, I thought she wasn’t going to let Luisa go. But it is just her way. I know that.
The car pulls up outside The New Amsterdam Hotel. It’s not the most expensive, but it’s handily located for the gallery. I like the look and feel of the rooms. Some hotels are so clinical in their design. There’s no soul. But at The New Amsterdam, the rooms are tastefully homely. We take the elevator up to the penthouse suite that I have booked for the week.
“Here is your room,” I say opening the door to one of the double bedrooms with a view overlooking the city. I bring in her baggage and she sits on the edge of the bed bouncing slightly. “The pool is on the rooftop here. Isn’t that cool?”
“Yes! I love New York, Papa!”
“See. I knew you would. There is so much to see here, Luisa. We are going to have the best time.”
