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“You're not leaving me.” I nod. He tips his face to look at me, those unfamiliar eyes boring into me. “Say it.” His voice is acidic, cold enough to bite.
I wet my lips. “I'm not leaving you.”
“No, because you're mine. And I take care of what's mine.” My stomach tightens at the possessiveness in his tone, but also at the sheer emptiness of his voice. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel anything for him but this isn't right.
My eyes are heavy and I can't tell whether it's because they are swollen or maybe I have a concussion? I force myself to stay awake and I listen to his breathing. It's erratic for a long while, his hold on me staying way too tight. I must have been lying here for hours until I'm sure his breathing has evened out and his grip on me loosens. This is my chance and this may be my only chance. I need to leave and get as far away from him as possible.
I peel his arm ever so carefully from around me, taking a pillow from the other side of the bed and gently sliding it underneath his head. I edge out of his grip little by little until the weight of him is completely gone. I don't risk a relieved breath. I creep out backwards, the pain in my leg shooting up my calf but I keep my eyes and ears trained on him and his breathing, ignoring the fact I can’t put my weight on my leg.
When I reach the bedroom door I fumble with the handle, pressing it softly and it groans. I freeze, keeping my eyes locked on his face. I stop breathing when he twitches. He settles again and I open it enough to slip out. As soon as he's out of my eyesight I pick up the pace, still keeping my footsteps light. I take my bag from the lounge, seeing the pool of my blood among the shards of glass. I still hear silence when I open the front door thanking the universe when I find it unlocked. I pull it closed behind me hearing the faint click and I bolt even though my whole body is screaming in pain. I half sprint - half limp to my car practically falling into the driver seat and peeling away from the curb, it's only when I get out of his street do I realise I have nowhere to go.
I flip down the mirror and assess the damage. My lip is double the size and bleeding from the hole. There's blood in my hair from when I hit the floor. Both my eyes and cheekbones are already starting to swell. The bruising isn’t apparent but I know it will be tomorrow. Looking at the state of me there's no way I can go home. Aleks still there, Steve will be home. They can't see me like this. Only now do I let the sobs escape me. I try to keep driving but with the swelling and the tears, I can't see a thing, I still don’t stop. I've not got this far to be dragged back by an angrier Tom.
I can't go home. I can't go to my grandma's. Hannah no longer lives in the country, I have no options.
I keep driving until I'm out of the area. I pull over on the side of a quiet road I don’t recognise and switch the engine off.
He's not going to let me go. I saw the look in his eyes. The only thing that ever came close was the look on my dad's face when he almost killed my mum. I need to get away. There's only one place I can go, to Hannah. To New York. He can’t follow me there, not with his record. I lean my head back against the headrest, wrap my arms around myself and let myself cry.
When I wake up the next morning, it's nearly 1 p.m. How I slept in a car through the midday sun, I don't know. I most definitely have a concussion because I'm starting to feel extremely nauseous like every movement makes my head swim. My phone is again full of messages. All from Tom.
12:52 PM
Tom
I try not to cry but I do.
I wait until the tears stop before I dial my mum's number.
“Hey, love.”
I clear my throat “Hey, is Alek home?” She doesn't notice but even to my own ears, my voice sounds strained and wobbly.
“No, he just left. He said something about him and Tom having a meeting with Jamie. He won't be back till tonight.” Jamie Reyes. Aka one of the two kingpins that rule this city.
I relax a bit because Jamie lives all the way in North London, Hampstead way meaning they’ll both be gone for a couple of hours at the least. “Is anyone else home?” I wince in pain, my hand coming up to cradle my jaw.
“No, Jack’s at school and Steve and Michael are at work. Why?”
“Doesn't matter, I'll be back soon.” I hang up as I start the car and drive home. I need to get this done quickly before Tom finds me and Alek sees the state of me.
I pull my hood up when I exit my car, not wanting the neighbours to see me. My mum is sitting at the kitchen table on her phone when I enter. Her face pales when she takes me in and she immediately jumps up rushing over to me to inspect my face. “What happened?”
I break down falling into her arms and I tell her everything that happened last night through broken sobs. She holds me tightly whilst I cry, her hands stroking my back in soothing motions. When I finish she guides me over to the kitchen table and pulls me out a chair. I flop down wincing at the pain in my leg. She pulls out her first aid kit and places it in front of me on the table.
She pulls my leg to rest on her lap. It's covered in dried blood, cuts covering the skin. She inhales sharply before focusing on my face, her eyes lined with silver as she starts to cry. “We need to call Steve and Alek.” She says as she takes an antiseptic wipe to my leg.
“No, Alek cant kno- ah fuck!” I screech as the alcohol stings the fresh wounds. “One step out of line and he will be remanded to prison, let alone a fucking murder charge.” She's quiet for a moment whilst she checks for glass and cleans out the cuts.
“We can't just let this go. Look at you, Casimira. He brutalised you.” She shudders at the last sentence, trying to hold back the tears as she wraps a bandage around my leg with shaky fingers. I can't imagine how she's feeling right now. With what she went through with my dad and then seeing your daughter in a similar position, it must be dragging up so many awful memories for her. Hell, it's dragging the same memories up for me.
“Alek will kill him, he won't even hesitate. He can't know.” I say quietly looking for her eyes even though my right eye is barely open anymore.
She takes a breath, her hands shaking. She knows I'm right. My brother is deathly protective of me. We went to a party back when we were seventeen, he witnessed someone put something in my drink and he put the guy in hospital. This is not something he needs to deal with right now. I’m not going to be the reason he goes to prison.
She takes another wipe from the kit and gently wipes over the hole in my lip, pulling it back so she can inspect the wound. “You need to get away for a while.” I can hear the shake in her voice. “Can you go and stay with Hannah?” She drops my lip and I wince. She looks at me again, her eyes filled with emotion.
“Yeah, I rang her on the way over here. I already had a plane ticket. I just need to change the date.”
