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“It’s not the where that matters. It’s the principle of not being under some dude’s thumb,” she says. “It’s about freedom.”
4PAST PRESENT
Stella
This alien is a psycho. He laughs at the idea of freedom, as if there’s no way in the universe I’d ever be allowed that. It doesn’t even occur to him that maybe I deserve it. Maybe it’s my fucking birthright. He’s not the first male I’ve encountered who thinks of me as property, something to possess and inevitably trade. It’s just so fucking disappointing to discover that even massive, advanced aliens who look like an orc and an elf fucked a dragon are just as misogynistic as fleshy human men.
I want to teach him a lesson. I want to teach them all lessons about captivity and freedom and what it means to be a fucking person even if, yeah, you happen to have a vagina.
I need to get off this ship and back to Earth, I guess. Earth was also full of psychos, though. It’s possible that if everybody you meet is a psycho, then you might be the actual psycho, but I refuse to think about that too deeply. My ass is sore inside the snug confines of my new clothing, and the collar around my neck feels like a heavy thing weighing me down, containing and grounding me. I keep putting my fingers up to touch it, sometimes to curl around the edge and tug, sometimes to run my fingers over the ridges and valleys of it. These wires are primed to deliver pain, but only if I disobey him.
“Come with me,” he orders.
I leave the room without ill-effect this time, which tells me the collar only works if he is there to make it work. Alright. That’s going to make my life easier when it comes to…
I hear voices. Human voices. Male and female. I assume they’re other pets. I’m keen to see who else is on this vessel. Maybe I can get them together, stage a mass escape. There’s power in numbers, right?
Rounding a corner, I catch sight of what looks like camouflage uniform. For a split-second, I’m confused. More than confused. I am thrown back to another place and another time. I am smaller. I am scared. I am suddenly alone in the world — or at least that is how it feels.
The scent of my mother no longer comforts me. The house is cold in her absence. In her place are soldiers. A lot of them. Their heavy boots stamp above my head and below my feet day and night as they make their patrols. My father tells me that they are here to keep me safe, but I do not feel safe. Not even a little bit. The home I once knew has been invaded, and I’ll never feel safe again.
I throw myself back around the corner, pressed hard against the wall.
Kahn follows me, a curious expression as he looks down at me.
“What is the matter?”
That can’t be a uniform. It can’t be. I’m probably just going insane from stress. That would make so much more sense. I’m on an alien spaceship. There’s no way I just saw what I thought I saw. It’s not actually possible. Is it?
I take another peek around the corner and almost pee my pants. I wasn’t imagining it. There’s a tall human man wearing an army uniform, standing and talking to another human man, wearing another army uniform.
“Those are fucking soldiers,” I hiss at Kahn.
“Unfortunately, yes,” he sighs.
With that confirmation reassuring me that I am not, in fact, crazy, I scramble away from the corner and retreat to his room — the same room I just ran from.
“Don’t let them see me,” I beg as he follows after me. “Don’t let them know I am here. Please. I beg you.”
“Why?”
“They’ll kill me,” I blurt.
He cocks his head and looks at me, even more deeply curious. “Why would they do that?”
I just start talking as fast as I can, saying the first things that come to mind. “Because they’re after me. They were hunting me. That’s why I was trying to get to that fucking village. I figured if I could pass myself off as one of the country people, the’d lose my trail.”
“My brother believes they were coming after him as a result of the crash. The villagers led him to imagine that they had seen the ship, and…”
“No. They weren’t coming for a ship. They were coming after me. They can’t know I’m here. And they… you have let me go. You have to get me a very, very long way from here. Do you understand?”
“I understand you’re panicking,” he says, going to one knee in front of me as my breath comes in short gasps. He puts his hands on my shoulders, pressing down firmly but not hard enough to hurt me. I feel myself being physically grounded by this great big alien who I have already decided to hate.
I am trembling. I hate that I am trembling. I want to give him a show of strength so badly, but I can’t. Seeing those soldiers makes me want to curl up in a little ball and sob like a baby.
Kahn
“Come here,” I hear myself saying, drawing Stella into a tight hug. I did not intend to coddle her. Not one bit. I intended to keep her like the little animal she is, in appropriate caging. But suddenly she looks so scared and so small. My sympathies are aroused, which is a great surprise to me. I did not know I had any.
