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Callan
Fuck, I’m all fucked up.
Callan
She left tonight and I don’t think she’s coming back.
Callan
Jesus, Ethan, I know I said some shit that I shouldn’t have, but you need to fucking get past that.
Callan
I fucking need you tonight.More than I’ve ever fucking needed you.
I drain my glass of whiskey and pour another.I’ve almost drained it too when my phone rings.
“Fuck me,” I mutter when I see my brother’s name flash across the screen.I stab at it and answer the call.“I didn’t think you’d bother replying.”
“You’re making me regret this already.”
I shove my fingers through my hair and work like fuck to hold my shit together.“Don’t hang up.”
We’re both silent to the point where I wonder if we’ll even manage a short conversation.Then, Ethan says, “Why’d she leave?”
“She’s running.”
“Yeah, but what was her reason?”
“She wants me to quit highlining.”
“Fuck.”
“Yeah.”
“The one thing you’ll never quit.”He pauses before adding, “And you fucking hate ultimatums.”
“Yeah.”
“Would you consider it for her?”
“I’d rather she considered learning about the safety precautions I take.”
“Right, but I think we both know there’s no way she’s going to do that.”
I throw some more whiskey down my throat.“It’s fucked up and I don’t know what to do to get her to listen to me.”
He’s silent for a beat.“I’ll call her.”
“I don’t think she’ll listen.”
“All I can do is try.And Callan?”
“What?”
“You need to think about what you really want here.I know what highlining gives you, but will you be happy with that decision when you’re old and staring at your grave after a life of not having Liv in it?”
Long after we end the call, I’m still thinking about his question.I fall asleep just after three a.m.and still don’t have an answer.The only thing I know is that for the first time in my life, I can’t see the future.There is no future I’ve ever contemplated that didn’t have Olivia in it.
