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There is a buzz, a voice, but my head is screaming too loud to hear it.
Finally, it penetrates the memories. “Kai, I’m here. You’re okay. I’m here.”
Kaito.
I blink away the lingering ghosts and focus on the blue orbs of my monster. With a slow blink, I realize I wanted to be saved. I wanted him to save me. I didn’t want to sink down there like I expected.
As I’m staring into those loving, cerulean eyes, I realize the truth.
I don’t want to die anymore.
I don’t know when I stopped fighting to live, but now I am living to fight.
I don’t want to die; I want to live.
With him, with them.
I want a future. I want their hands in the darkness. I want their promises. I want their mornings and goodnights. I want their meals and laughter. I want their songs and tears. I want them. I want this.
This . . . life.
It’s a split-second epiphany but it feels like my whole world alters and shifts.
Remaking me into a new person.
The person they love and want.
A fighter.
“I’ve got you,” he says, panic in his voice as he holds my naked body close under the water. He cuts through it and toward the edge of the pool, hoisting me up and partially out until I’m sitting on the side. I’m shivering, wet, and naked. “You’re okay, you’re okay,” he rasps, his hands gliding over my body to search for any injuries.
When I cover them, he blinks and stops. “I’m okay,” I croak. “Just a memory, I’m okay now.”
He relaxes with a sigh, and it’s the moment we both realize I’m naked and he’s pressed between my legs.
Desire bursts to life from his touches and his closeness, chasing away the last of the ghosts haunting me.
His eyes widen and he tries to dive backwards, but I lock my legs around him.
I want to live, so I’m going to.
Leaning down, I cup his jaw and kiss him, claiming him as our bodies slide together.
I breathe in the life I find within his touch.
Chapter
Thirty-Five
KAI
Groaning into my mouth, he forces my thighs wider as he moves between them, his wet body pressed tightly to mine as he takes over the kiss. His hands slide down my nude back, causing goosebumps to rise in his wake. Our tongues tangle as my legs tighten around him, until it’s too much and not enough all at the same time.
Yanking my mouth away, I gasp for breath, my heart racing and body quaking with untapped desire. It’s so strong, like a flame brought back to life after a long summer.
“I need . . . ,” I begin. “I need more, please.”
“I know what you need, Kai. I’ve got you. Trust me,” he begs.
