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“Then what about Mae?”
“After Janie went into the treatment facility, Mae helped out with the kids from time to time. They adored her. They stopped by the inn every day after school, and she always had cookies and milk waiting for them. Soon enough, I took to stopping by, too. Mae was a godsend for all of us during that first year.”
He met Trace’s gaze. “It’s important that you know that nothing improper went on between us. I considered myself a married man and I loved my wife. But I loved Mae, too. Since you’re not even sure if love exists, I don’t know if you can understand that it’s possible for a man to love two women, but I did. If I had thought for a single second that my friendship with Mae would hurt Janie, I would have ended it. But the truth was, there were times when Janie didn’t even seem to know who I was, didn’t seem to care that I was there to visit. That never kept me from going, but it did make me see that I didn’t need to lock my heart away in that place with her. I gave Mae every bit of love I felt free to give her. I also gave her the freedom to choose whether to love me. I admired her too much to do anything less.”
He sighed. “Given the way of the world now, a lot of men would have divorced a wife like Janie and moved on. That wasn’t my way. I’d made a commitment, and I honored it in the only way I knew how. And whether you believe it or not, I honored my commitment to Mae the same way.”
“I’m sorry you were in such a difficult position,” Trace said. “It must have been heartbreaking.”
“Having Mae in my life was one of the best things that ever happened to me. I can’t possibly regret that it couldn’t have been more, except for her sake. She deserved better.”
“I think you made her very happy,” Trace told him.
“I hope so,” Nate said, then paused and looked directly into Trace’s eyes. “There’s a reason I’m telling you this. I always believed that one day Mae and I would be able to be together openly, that we’d marry and spend our remaining years together. Maybe even do a little traveling. We never had that chance.”
Trace understood what he was saying. “This is your way of reminding me that life is short and unpredictable.”
“Exactly. If you love Savannah, don’t waste time counting the days until it seems appropriate to tell her. Don’t fritter away precious hours planning for the future. Start living every moment. I’ve lived a good long life, but I’m here to tell you that it’s still a whole lot shorter than I’d like.”
They’d circled around and were back at Nate’s driveway. “Think about what I said,” he told Trace.
“I will,” Trace promised. “Would you like to join us for Christmas dinner?”
“I would, but I’ll be going out to see Janie in a while. She seems to like it when I come by to read to her.”
“Thank you for sharing your story with me,” Trace said, genuinely touched that Nate had told him.
“Don’t thank me. Take my advice.” He grinned. “Otherwise, I have a feeling Mae will find some way to give me grief for failing her. That woman always did know how to nag.”
Nate was still chuckling as he walked slowly toward his house. Trace watched to make sure he didn’t slip on the icy patches, then walked back to Holiday Retreat, his heart somehow lighter and more certain.
CHAPTER TEN
For the life of her, Savannah couldn’t read Trace’s expression when he got back from his walk. She thought he looked more at peace with himself, but had no idea what that meant.
She was also still puzzling over his magnanimous decision to give her Aunt Mae’s stock. Had that been his way of making her financially independent to ease his own conscience and rid himself of some crazy sense of obligation to look after her? Was that going to make it easier for him to pack his bags in a day or two and walk away? When he left, would he go with no intention of ever looking back on her or Holiday Retreat as anything more than a pleasant memory? If that happened, it would break Hannah’s heart.
It would break Savannah’s heart, too.
“How’s the turkey coming?” Trace inquired, peering over her shoulder to look into the oven. “It certainly smells fantastic.”
“Another hour or so,” she told him, wishing he would stay right behind her, his body close to hers.
She stood up and turned slowly to face him, relieved that he didn’t back away. She reached up and cupped his cheeks. “You’re cold. How about some hot chocolate? Or some tea?”
“I’m fine,” he said, slipping his arms around her waist. “I’d rather have a kiss. I’m sure it would do a much better job of warming me up.”
Savannah tilted her face up for his kiss. His mouth covered hers and brought her blood to a slow simmer. She couldn’t be sure if it was working on Trace, but her body temperature had certainly shot up by several degrees. She sighed when he released her.
“Warmer now?” she inquired with forced cheer.
“Definitely,” he said, his eyes blazing with desire. “Too bad we can’t send Hannah for a ski lesson right this second.”
“Are you sure we can’t?” Savannah inquired hopefully.
“Nope. They’re all booked up at the lodge.”
She stared at him, biting back a chuckle. “You actually checked?”
