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I race through the house and shut myself in my bedroom, tossing my bag to the floor. Next off is my jacket and then my shoes, before I dive onto the bed and bury myself under the covers.
Later that night when I’m called for dinner, I drag my feet, wishing my earlier plea to eat in my room hadn't fallen on deaf ears. Especially as at dinner when I quickly realize that isolating myself in my room has done nothing to prepare me for seeing him again. It’s been a matter of hours, and yet it’s like I’m seeing him for the first time again. My legs feel like jelly as I walk to the table and sink into my chair.
There’s no way I’m going to be able to eat, not with the way my tongue feels thick in my mouth.
My mama, always wanting to make people feel welcome, starts the conversation as she sits at the table. She’s oblivious to the rushing in my ears when she asks, “So, Noah, how long have you been in Montgomery?”
“We moved right at the end of summer, ma’am.”
Mama laughs as she says, “Please, call me Sadie. How are you finding it?”
Noah serves himself some of the salad from the bowl in the middle of the table, and I watch his movements from under my lashes. “It’s different from New York, but I’m liking it.”
He’s from New York?
“You don’t sound like you’re from New York,” I blurt out before I can stop myself. My cheeks flame as all eyes turn to face me.
My dad is the first to speak. “Now, don’t be rude, Savannah.”
I drop my eyes to the mac and cheese on my plate. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude.”
When I’m greeted with silence, I look up into his stunning hazel eyes. One side of his mouth is lifted, and it’s then that I notice how pillowy his lips are. “It’s okay. I grew up all over, so was never in one place long enough to have just one accent.”
“Oh, okay,” I breathe, as if he’s just told me the most fascinating fact.
He doesn’t try to hide the smile that lights up his face and I drop my head as my cheeks heat again at being the center ofhisattention.
I spend the rest of dinner focused on eating my food until I can excuse myself to my room on the pretext of doing my homework. The reality is I did it hours ago. I just need to not be near him right now.
When he leaves, I watch through the slats of my blinds in my bedroom window as he walks down the driveway and to a house a couple of doors down. When his front door closes, I finally move and flop down onto my bed as I look up at the ceiling. Everything that happened today plays like a movie in my mind as I scrutinize our every interaction.
Laying in the darkness, unable to sleep, I vow to myself from this day forward I will be brave and bold. I won’t hide anymore.
* * *
This is how I met Noah, my brother's best friend. It was the first day I fell in love and realized that you can’t always have the one you want.
I wish I’d known when we first met what was to come, of all the heartache and pain that would follow.
Would I still have gone through it?
Most definitely.
ONE
Savannah
THIRTEEN YEARS LATER
This has been both the longest and worst week I’ve had in a very long time. I've been away for weeks at a workshop with my theatre production. Which wouldn’t normally be an issue, especially as we'd nailed the timings and had everything perfected. But then we found out the producer had pulled the funding and the show was canceled.
Just like that.
Four hours ago I was working my ass off upstate, pushing through the pain of my aching feet and now I’m walking down the sidewalk of New York City, ready for a nap.
Despite shows being canceled all the time, it doesn’t make it hurt any less. Everyone had worked so hard to get everything perfected and for it to all go to waste is just so frustrating, but unfortunately, it is the nature of the beast when it comes to Broadway.
I love working on Broadway; it’s been my dream for as long as I could remember. Get out of Montgomery, Alabama, check. Make it big on Broadway in New York, in progress.
