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With a nod and Meghan’s words echoing around my mind, I walk back to the living room.
Why wouldn’t Sutton marry Noah if he asked?
Does she not love him?
I have so many questions. But I know I won’t get any answers because it’s not my place to ask them.
Taking a seat, I’m pulled back into the conversation when I hear Alex ask Sutton, “So, it’s basically over if he doesn’t come through for this event?”
Leaning forward slightly, I tilt my head, feigning nonchalance as I listen intently, waiting for an answer.
Sutton looks at me, a look I can’t quite decipher taking over her face. “Pretty much. Our relationship has been slowly dying for months. I’m very aware though that neither of us has been making any effort. In my mind, this is the revival. He knows how important it is for me so I know he’ll be there. But if we can’t get that intimacy back… what are we even doing together?”
Ben reaches out and holds onto Sutton’s hand, comforting her. As her friend I should be doing that, but I just can’t get past my own feelings, and I feel like the worst person for it.
For the rest of the evening, I’m stuck in my own head. Questions swirling, demanding answers. The most prominent being, how could I have not seen that they werethatdistant?
Now more than ever, I need to get the money together to move out. Because if Noah and Sutton break up, I can’t stay living with him. Not with it being just the two of us.
FOURTEEN
Noah
It’s been a long fucking day of unexpected meetings and endless paperwork. Sometimes I question why I decided to make mergers and acquisitions my career. But then I remember all I’ve achieved and what I was able to do for my mom. All of the long hours and crushing weight of responsibility has been worth it.
Has it?
The question hovers at the forefront of my mind giving me pause. What have I had to give up in order to become a billionaire before I turned thirty?
A wave of what could have been envelopes me, desperately trying to drag me into its pit of despair. Shaking my head, I clear the thoughts from my mind. There’s no point in thinking about shoulda, woulda, coulda, events.
I’m grateful for everything I do have. Like a mom that’s safe, a home to call my own, a thriving business and Sutton.
But I’m not happy with her.
Christ, I haven’t been happy in this relationship for so long.
I know Sutton can give me everything I’ve ever wanted in a relationship. But something’s holding me back. It’s stopping me from being all in. I’m just not entirely sure whatitis. So I’ve buried myself in work. Taking on tasks that can be delegated to my more than competent team, until I’m working sixteen hour days nearly seven days a week.
Pulling off my tie, an object flies past my head, hitting the wall opposite the bed with a dull thud. My eyes narrow as I try to make out what it is. I turn in the direction that it came from just as Sutton storms into the room, slamming the door behind her. A fire burns bright in her eyes as she looks at me with a mask of fury.
With a calm tone that somehow seems to say nothing is wrong at the same time that it conveys her anger, she asks, “How could you? I never expected you, of all people, to do this to me.”
I blink, trying to process what she could mean. How could I do what? My mind races through the events of the last few months and anything I could have possibly done wrong. The only thing that sticks out is that night over a month ago. I should have told her. She had a right to know. Guilt consumes me. Ready to plead for forgiveness, I reply, “I’m sorry.”
With a defeated tone that tells me just how done she is, Sutton replies, “I just don’t understand why you didn’t turn up, Noah?” Her wide, hurt gaze lifts to mine as she continues, “You knew how much this meant to me. I looked like a fool, standing there waiting for my boyfriend, like some high schooler waiting for a date that never shows.”
My body relaxes before I catch myself.
What the fuck am I doing?
Apologizing for seeing Savannah half dressed flies out of my head as I let Sutton’s words sink in. Why do I feel relieved that my girlfriend is pissed at me not showing up for her?
Shit.
Sutton’s partner dinner was tonight. I fucking forgot. My mind has been so preoccupied with cleaning up Teddy’s mess that it wasn’t a priority.
And just what does that say about how much I value my girlfriend?
