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“Why not?”
She shakes her head, blinks back the tears threatening to spill, then makes eye contact with me. “It’s not just my heart on the line. There are three of us. I can’t . . .” Her voice cracks. “I can’t let them fall for you, too. I have to protect them.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” My jaw clenches, not liking that she thinks we can walk away from each other so easily.
“Ian is dead. The man who killed him is inside that room.” She points to the door. “I have to distance myself from this for the sake of my kids.”
“Tell me so I can keep you safe.All of you.”
A simple tilt of her head,no. Then she pushes away from me. “I need to get back inside.”
She brushes past me, but I’m not finished. I need to know what her connection is to the man who hit us. I can’t keep her safe if I’m not sure who her enemies are, and why they’re coming for her. Her hand wraps around the handle of the door, but she pauses when I speak.
“Saoirse told me that Ian was killed.”
A disbelieving laugh escapes her. “I told you that.”
“You did, and I didn’t believe you. Who killed him?”
She turns to face me. Her eyes are sunken in, as if she hasn’t been sleeping. I force myself to stay in place despite the urge to go to her, to wrap her in my arms and take away the heartbreak. “She told me about Cara. And I just find it so sad that we were both too stubborn to tell each other about the pain we carry.”
Then she’s gone, leaving me alone in the alley while she heads back inside. I press my back against the brick, my head hitting it. The pain splinters from my skull, down my neck, and I savor it. I need a smoke before I head inside, before I force a smile on my face while my chest aches with the need to find her when I know I shouldn’t.
She’s right. I should let her go. There’s no moving on from the secrets we kept from each other. So, I light up a cigarette and pretend that my life isn’t one giant fuck up.
Chapter Thirty-One
Myeyesburn.Ineed to sleep, and the house is empty. Too fucking quiet when all I want is to hold my babies, to make sure they’re safe. How hadn’t I put the link together before? That the Murphys are what Ian’s family and all the others said about them.
Criminals.
But they’re more than that. They know the men who killed my Ian.
I head for the fridge, thankful Vee could stay behind and let me leave the reception before it ended. It’ll be best for me to head back in the morning to clean up. I just had to get out of there. It was suffocating—between Declan following me around, the man with the scar confronting me, and the argument in the alleyway.
I pull out the bottle of wine from the back shelf and pop off the cork. I don’t bother with a glass and take a swig straight from the bottle. Bruce brushes past me and to the back door. I head toward him to let him outside. He books it off the patio and up toward the grassy area to do his business. Then we both head back inside.
He takes off upstairs to get in bed, no doubt. I lock the back door, then head for the living room to put on some reality TV. The background noise will be welcomed. Hopefully, it’ll silence the noise in my head.
A hand wraps around my mouth, and I let out a muffled scream.
The scent of cigarettes and fire. It’s not the familiarity of bergamot, or the gentle touch of Declan.It’s an intruder.My eyes widen, and I try to kick at his feet, but he holds me against him. I glance around for Bruce. He hasn’t come down, and I need to make enough noise he knows something is wrong.
“Batman!” I scream against the hand pressed to my mouth. The word comes out as a soft cry, and not his name.Bruce.
My heart slams against my sternum.
God, please don’t tell me I spent all this money on a dog that won’t be able to save me when I actually need him to.
I kick my foot out, shoving against the end table. The lamp falls to the floor in a loud crash.
“Stop fucking fighting.” The man grunts.
His breath is hot against my neck, and I’m immediately back to that day five years ago. Frozen, despite the self-defense classes. Helpless.
Bruce lets out a piercing bark as he barrels down the stairs. He bares his teeth and runs right for us, barking and snarling. He lunges for the man, biting the arm wrapped around me. The intruder lets out a grunt but releases me in reaction to the pain.
I drop to the ground and scurry away while Bruce lunges for his throat. He clamps on, and he doesn’t let go, shaking while the man screams in horror and falls to the ground.
