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“Well, I can’t compete with that.”
His eyes cut to hers, darkening. “What?”
“I can’t compete with a dead woman, Luke. And you’ve been holding onto her for nearly a decade.”
“I’m not asking you tocompetewith her. I just didn’t realize that we’d be… more.”
Her eyes narrowed, unsure what he was getting at.
Luke heaved a sigh. “When Pippa told me that you had feelings for me—”
Allie’s face blushed hotter than she’d ever experienced. “Pippa… said… what?” Humiliation drowned out the fears and frustrations she’d been dealing with, making it all nearly unbearable. There was only one logical thought that flooded her mind. Luke only wanted to be with her because there was no risk. He didn’t have to do anything to make her fall for him. She was already there. Her throat closed up and her stomach roiled.
He must have noted her change in demeanor. “Allie, it’s not what you think.”
“No. It’s so much worse. You’re scared of erasingher… and you think that’s what I want to do. It doesn’t matter that I’ve made this relationship super easy. You didn’t have to work to make me fall in love with you, and you’re still not ready to let her go.”
He shook his head. “I never said that.”
“You didn’t have to. And if you really think that I’m the type of person who wants to make either of you forget her, then we have a bigger problem than I realized.” She glanced off, her eyes burning with emotion. She couldn’t cry. Not here. Not now.
Maybe they needed to take a break or something—get their heads on straight. One thing was for certain, Luke needed to decide what he really wanted. And she needed to be okay with that outcome no matter how painful it might turn out.
Before she could make such a suggestion, Sarah’s mother interrupted. “Luke, do you have any more Styrofoam cups? We’re running low.” She glanced from Allie to Luke with a smile and her expression faltered. “If this isn’t a good time—”
Allie flashed her best smile. “It’s the perfect time! The hot chocolate stand is what makes this place work. I have to get going anyway.” Out of habit, she moved toward him and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll see you later.”
She strode away, chaos rampant within her. His eyes followed her, practically burning a hole in the back of her head. But he didn’t chase after her. He didn’t demand to talk or insist that he loved her.
This could be it—the moment she knew was coming.
Allie had experienced what it was like to be in Luke’s arms, and she’d been burned because of it. Their next conversation would be the one to end it all.
And there was no running from it.
CHAPTERSIXTEEN
Snow felloutside the window of Luke’s childhood home. Sometimes it drifted down lazily and sometimes the flakes came down fast.
He could hear Molly playing with her cousins in the other room, but all he could think about was his argument with Allie. She’d brought up several things that made him realize he’d been doing everything wrong.
He’d allowed himself to get so wrapped up in his worries about Molly and how she’d remember her mother that he couldn’t see what was right in front of him. It was definitely important for Molly to know how much Shellie had loved her, but two things could happen at once. He could start again with someone else. With Allie.
Allie was the perfect person for him to be with. Not only because of what she’d said but because of who she was. She’d cared about him long before he’d noticed her as more than her sister’s friend, and she still did. She loved him—something he didn’t doubt.
There was no need for him to ever worry that she would try to erase Shellie from their lives. She wasn’t that kind of person. Not even close. But she did deserve to feel secure in their relationship at the same time. It wasn’t fair or reasonable for him to expect her to accept second place.
He groaned loudly, but it did nothing to release the tension he could feel gathering in his chest. He’d made so many mistakes over the last few weeks and it had taken that conversation for him to realize it.
How had he been so blind to what was going on right in front of him? Every thought he had of Allie was good. She’d been there for him every step of the way. There was no one to blame but himself when it came to what had happened the last time he saw her.
Luke pulled out his phone, glancing once out the window to note the snow was coming down a bit harder. The weather forecaster said this would be the storm of the century. No light dusting this year. He couldn’t hold back a smirk when he thought of their history with snow in Sweet Bloom. They didn’t even get a dusting every year, so thinking of annual snow fall was amusing. But this year they were expecting good bit more snow which could mean shutting everything down.
He opened his messages, even though he knew she hadn’t responded since yesterday. After agreeing to snuggle up with them at Brent and Jackie’s place for the storm, she hadn’t said much else. The storm was probably going to last for a few days and they had plenty of food and drink at the ranch house. On top of that, they had a generator that would keep the lights on if it came to it.
Tapping his fingernail on the screen, he contemplated calling her. She should be here by now. The snow already covered the roads and it was drifting in some lower lying areas. This was basically unheard of. His thoughts immediately went to a bad place. What if she couldn’t get out of her house?
Or worse, what if she could, but she’d changed her mind and she was trying to avoid him?
