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“I don’t care enough to need proof.” I looked at the trailer across the street, knowing it was a lie but unable to take it back.

“Right,” Dad said, defeated. “Well, this is the first time in your life that I’ve been… me. So while it lasts, I want to be here for you however I can. I know you don’t need me, but I… I need you.”

Ignoring the last bit, I asked, “While it lasts?”

“Just in case I don’t…”

“You can’t think of it like that. Assuming failure.” Wasn’t qualified to give that advice, but it came out of my mouth anyway.

“I’m not. I know. I just… I know you don’t trust me, so I’m trying to seem somewhat unreliable like you expect me to be,” he laughed a little. “Setting the expectation low or something. A part of the program is making amends, so that’s why I’ve been here so much lately. I’m trying to do the right thing, even though you don’t want me around.”

Pathetically, Ididwant him around. This version of him. A dad I could talk to, trust, and rely on, but he’d never been that person to me. That person had always been my brother, and my dad had always been a threat. I couldn’t flip that switch too fast.

“But take it from someone who knows trouble, Madd. Something is going on with you, and I’m here to bounce ideas off if you need to.” He pocketed the chip and leaned back in his lawn chair, not pressuring me to talk.

I sat in silence for longer than was socially acceptable, but I’d never let social cues influence me before, and I wasn’t about to start now. Maybe he had a fresh perspective that could shine a new light on my situation. Maybe. Worth a shot.

“How do I protect someone from digging their own grave when they don’t want to listen to reason? How do I keep them out of legal trouble?”

“Records. Proof,” Dad said. “Depends what they’re doing. Did he do something?” he asked, knowing I spoke of Devon.

“He did, but not like that. He’s trying to protect me from…” Fuck, just admit the truth. “Jim’s back, and Devon is running his errands on the premise that Jim will keep his promise and disappear forever. He’s doing shady shit to protect me, but I don’t trust his dad, and I know this is somehow going to turn on Devon. Or Nate.”

“Jim’s a slimy weasel,” Dad said, nodding. “Never met a more selfish man. Devon isn’t like that?”

Oh, he was selfish, but without cruel intentions. “No.”

Dad cleared his throat. “You love this guy? This guy who you used to hate?”

“I hated him because you told me to.”

“Because I hated Jim. Xav never listened, but you took the bait easy enough,” he laughed. “But you love him now?”

I didn’t want to talk about my feelings for Devon with a dad that hadn’t been kind to me about dating a guy. Had that been him or the drugs? “More than anything.”

“And he won’t stop whatever he’s doing?”

“Not unless I lock him up.”

“Well, God knows I’ve made a ton of mistakes in life, but if I had to give any advice, it’d be to let Devon go and do his thing. If you can’t stop the hero, stop the villain, you know?”

“How?”

“If your main concern is that Jim is going to frame Devon, then frame Jim.”

Logical, but was I smart enough to pull that off? My biggest accomplishment in life was dating a dipshit and being a grunt worker. Didn’t exactly have high hopes for myself.

“How?” I asked again.

Dad smiled. “That piece of shit has so many skeletons in his closet, it’s like searching for a needle in a needle stack. Pick one and exploit the hell out of it.”

Pick one.

Step one in protecting Devon from his own idiocy.

AfterDadwenthometo wherever the hell he stayed these days, I spent a decent night with Xavi and my mom. It felt good. Important. A healing night or some shit.

By the time I got home, it was after eleven and I didn’t even know if Devon would be there. I’d purposefully not invited him to dinner because I needed to stop my jaw from ticking every time I looked at him, but by this point, I just needed to see him.

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