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PROLOGUE
ALEX
The crowd screams my name and it's like a tsunami hitting me though I am yards away on a raised stage. They shout, wave and sing along. Many yell out their love for me, along with holding signs declaring their devotion.
They hold up their arms in an X. A symbol that’s become synonymous with my name.
Xandra.
I don’t even need a last name.
I scan over the mass of humanity.
Years ago, I craved this. Dreamt of it.
Now, it terrifies me.
Can they tell?
I glance off stage and see Nicco standing there. More than a mere bodyguard, he's the protector of not just my body, but my secrets. My fears. And my increasing dissatisfaction with this supposed dream life.
Behind me the band runs through the intro of my finale. Nicco glances my way and gives me an encouraging smile.
He's hot and his smile could melt the panties off an ice sculpture.
But not for me. Yuck.
He's the protective older brother every girl dreams of. Older brother from another mother. And father. But, you get the idea.
The band continues to hold, waiting for me. We've done this drill thousands of times. Some people think I'm building the drama and getting the fans whipped up for my big ending.
Can they see the way my legs quiver beneath the custom-designed outfit I'm wearing?
Nicco raises his brow at me and dips his head, silently asking if I'm okay. Our eyes meet and it gives me strength. The strength I need to perform this one last song.
Do what I must do. What’s expected of me. I never let anyone down.
Except myself.
I grip the mic in my hands. Everyone uses those wireless things attached to their ears, but I like the feel of the mic. My fingers close over it and then I glance to my other side and make eye contact with Josh, my band leader. His face shows concern. We've spent too many hours together for him not to know what I'm really feeling. He gives me a look similar to Nicco's and I give him the same nod.
He smiles and gestures to the rest of the musicians and the sound takes off, carrying me along with it as I belt out my first big hit. Sometimes when I'm singing it, I think back to who I was ten years ago when I went to the top of the charts with my debut song.
That poor girl had no idea what was in store for her.
I miss her.
But no one looking at me would know the turmoil churning inside. Giant screens project my image all around and I check myself out. Yeah. I look good. I'm performing the hell out of this song and I can barely hear myself among the thousands of voices singing along.
I guess they don't really need me, do they?
While I watch myself on the jumbo-tron, I touch my forehead and rub it. I stop singing but no one notices.
No one but Nicco.
I look back out over the crowd and they fade away as I fall down.
Nicco catches me before I make contact with the stage and everyone in the crowd screams. It takes the band a few seconds to realize what's happening and they stop playing. Several rush toward me but Nicco's got me in his arms and he's screaming for an ambulance.
