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And I chooseElliot?
Does my brain truly have something against me? Or are my instincts that broken?
He takes his time analyzing me. He always does that, and people just let him. If maybe someone cut him off while he does that thing of trying to get into your brain, then he wouldn’t have so much power over all of us.
“I was there that night. I saw you stop him before he did that to her,” he says, his words calculated. “Why did you stop him?”
This is the moment he expects me to say what happened to me. He isn’t stupid; he knows I was talking from experience.
But I refuse to let another person tell me I made it up. So the topic is closed.
“I didn’t stop him. I beat her up.”
“To stop him,” he insists.
“Oh my god, yes! Will you drop it now? Why would I want another woman to be raped?”
“And he just…let you stop him.”
I throw my head back, cackling like a maniac.
“Have you ever met Sawyer? He took out his sexual frustration on someone else that night. Don’t worry.”
His nostrils flare. “Jade.” His voice is low. It’s his anger that’s palpable now. “Don’t tell me you stopped him assaulting her, only for you to be on the receiving end of it. You sacrificed yourself for Billie?” A beat. “Billie?” he hisses. “Who cares about an NSC bitch Caden fell for if you had to be the one to get hurt.”
I shake my head. “He didn’t rape me. Sawyer and I had sex all the time. It didn’t change anything.”
“Because he wasblackmailing you.” He steps closer, fisting my shirt. “That is not consent.”
My throat closes up, but it’s anger that prevails. Always anger. “And what do you do, Elliot? Your protection in exchange for my body. What is that?”
“Don’t. We have a history, we…” He stops himself, his face falling. “Jade…tell me this is more than just me giving you protection. Tell me you just used it as an excuse…that you wanted me.”
There’s no point lying to him. Why? To make him feel bad? I go for the truth instead.
“I wanted you,” I admit. “You needing me so much that you wanted to make a deal for it only made me want you more. I’m a slut, remember?”
A smile slowly spreads on his face, so terrifying I steel myself so I don’t retreat.
“No, my love. You’re not a slut. You’remyslut.”
He reaches into his back pocket, pulling out something he holds tightly. A collar. Different from the one I had on until this morning.
This one is partly leather, partly chain. The delicate metal links that run through it have a heart dangling at the front. He doesn’t hesitate to put it on me, and I let him.
I don’t even fight it.
Maybe because Ethan is right; I’m falling for a borderline psychopath.
Or maybe because when Elliot calls mehisslut, my stomach does a backflip despite me forbidding it to.
The front chain is adjustable, and that’s when I realize it’s a choker. He hooks his index finger in the heart and pulls. The collar tightens and I’m forced to follow his movement.
A surprised gasp parts my lips when he raises his hand and I have to go on my toes until his mouth grazes mine.
“I’m sorry for not believing you,” he whispers. “Truly. I was angry and jealous. I should have known right away that it’s exactly like Sawyer to do something like that. If you don’t want to tell me what he had on you, that’s okay. Take your time. When you’re ready to open up again, I’ll be ready to listen.”
My heart tightens, but thankfully, my brain keeps me sane. He still hasn’t admitted anything about his involvement in my relationship with Ethan. About him and I getting closer while my ex slowly disappeared into the background.
