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I gulp air when he lets me go. That felt…that felt like the kind of kiss he would give me when we were together. I’m dizzy, panting. This isn’t right.
“Do you know why I hate you, Jade?”
Being hit by a car was less painful. How can he say he hates me after that kiss?
I barely feel the shake of my head, so I wonder if it’s even visible to him.
“Because you think me breaking up with you was achoice.It makes me hate you to realize that the girl I loved more than anything doesn’t know me. Not at all. Not even a tiny bit.”
I fall to the floor when he lets go of my hips. My knees give up from the shock of his revelation. He slams the bathroom door, but I don’t even react.
Did he just say he didn’t have a choice in our breakup?
That someonemadehim do it?
Am I reading too much into this?
I look at the palms of my hands. At the two band-aids that he plastered on there. They’re the kind with yellow smiley faces on them, but there are X’s instead of eyes, like the face is dead, and they have a little tongue popping out. The ones I used to buy. They made me laugh because it didn’t give much hope for the person who needed them. Ethan thought it was hilarious too, so he kept buying these ones every time I needed fixing. Pretty often, since we live on the North Shore.
Oh…fuck. I don’t think I’m reading into this.
My ex-boyfriend was forced to break up with me.
23
JADE
Ghost - Halsey
“Stupid fucking…you’re dead. So fucking dead,” I grunt, before licking my bleeding finger.
That stupid van is a mess. It’s fixable, but it’ll snow in hell before I can tune it to the minimum standards of aracingvehicle.
Kay is deluded. This entire plan is going to get us arrested at best, killed if we’re lucky, victims of police violence at worst. I can’t believe I’m back to working for the bitch again.
The hate I felt for her in senior year is coming back tenfold. We were such good friends beforeitall happened.
What kind of leader are you if you’re incapable of protecting your crew? If you throw them to the wolves. If you don’t defend them when they tell you what’s been done to you. Out of all people, I thought Kay would be the one to understand me. Everyone in the Kings knows her dad was abusive. That her mom left because her and Caden are the results of just how much he forced himself on her.
And yet when she heard of what had happened to me…nothing.
No one believed me.
“I do wonder at what point in your life you became such a violent, angry little thing.”
Elliot’s voice startles me. I whip around, narrowing my gaze on him. My hair is in a high ponytail today, but the length is thickly falling onto my neck and between my shoulder blades. Despite the outside freezing temperatures, I’m hot from working on the van, and I can feel sweat dampening my back and my chest.
“I’m not violent and angry. This van is just driving me insane.”
Ignoring my lie, he keeps sharing his thoughts as he leans against the doorframe that leads from the garage to the kitchen, crossing his arms.
“I think it was in high school, because you were as sweet as they come through middle school.”
“Whatever.” I turn back to the open van. I wipe my hands from the black oil and take the notepad I’ve been using to write down everything that needs to be changed. So pretty much everything.
“Thinking about it,” he carries on. I’m not sure if he’s talking to me or just sharing his thought process out loud. “You were fine in your first years of high school. Was it when Ethan broke up with you?”
Doing my best to ignore him, I keep my eyes on the notepad. “I need you to take me to a garage.”
