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“You’re gonna survive this, beautiful.”
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
The Final Nail in the Coffin
Natalie felt so depressed. The past ten years of her life flashed before her eyes as she sat across from her husband and drank a cup of coffee. They had gone to a local diner to talk but were struggling to communicate. Natalie did not know where to begin. She felt terrible about the way everything had turned out in her life. Ever since Aria was born, she believed Noah was the father. A tear rolled down her cheek as she fondly remembered her relationship with him. He was her first love. After eighteen years, Natalie realized she had never got over him. Spending time with her ex at the hospital had triggered her to self-reflect. The accident had brought the former lovers closer in ways she had never expected.
While Aria was growing up, she often saw traces of Noah in her, since she didn’t have Robert’s brown eyes.
The truth was always in front of me. I just didn’t want to see it.
It was hard to console her husband and be happy about the paternity results when she wasn’t deep down. Noah had been right to confront Robert with all his shortcomings, Natalie thought.
He’s never been a good husband to me, much less a father to Aria.
She often wished she could turn back the clock and have married Noah. Natalie had refused his proposal because she believed Robert was the safer choice. By the time she got pregnant with the twins, she realized he did not make her happy. But it was too late to consider divorce when she had newborns to raise, and she did not want to do it alone. Every year that passed in her passionless marriage, Natalie felt as if she was losing pieces of herself. Living with Rob had changed who she was. She lived from paycheck to paycheck, taking care of a man who was abusive. Robert’s poor qualities outweighed the good.
For years, Natalie felt trapped in her marriage. Her fear of being poor as a single mother had always been incentive enough to make her work through her marital issues. She was about to ask her husband a question when a server came by with Robert’s meal. Natalie politely declined a refill and took her time finishing her coffee. She kept replaying the conversation she had had with Noah. His financial help was a godsend; she was grateful.
Staring out the window, Natalie remembered Noah’s charismatic smile and hypnotic blue eyes. She could never forget the way he had held her hand, reassuring her that everything would be okay.
He’s still the love of my life.
Her heart ached knowing she was no longer his.
“This steak is dry!” Robert complained.
“We’re not exactly sitting in a five-star restaurant, are we?” Natalie said, ignoring his rant.
You never protected me, Mom. You never defended me. You should have left him the first time he laid his hands on me!
Aria’s voice echoed in her head like a phantom. Natalie felt as if she was stuck in a never-ending maze—lost, with no direction.But now she had finally reached a door she had avoided for years: a door she should have walked through a long time ago if only she had had the courage.
Scarfing down his food, Robert released the loudest belch before he wiped the corner of his mouth with a napkin. Natalie stared down at her empty coffee cup in contemplation.
Time to walk through that door.
Looking lifeless and numb, she lifted her head and met her husband’s eyes. “I want a divorce.”
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
EVAN
Another sleepless night. I wasn’t sure why these nightmares were haunting me again. I hated having to watch my mother die in front of me. I could never save her. My train of thought was suddenly disrupted when my cat hopped on my bed. Most men opt for a dog as a furry companion, but there were a lot of things to appreciate about felines. Ancient Egyptians used to worship them. Maybe that’s why they can be such arrogant assholes—possibly an adaptive trait.
Baxter started meowing as he pawed at my stomach.
“All right, you little bastard. Let’s get you some food.”
Careful not to trip over boxes, I made my way to the kitchen, fed my cat, and poured myself a glass of water before hitting the shower. All I could think about was Aria. I woke up every morning with this girl on my mind, and I went to bed the same way. If I wasn’t having nightmares about my mother getting raped and murdered, I was dreaming about Aria. I needed her in my life. I don’t think she had the slightest clue how I truly felt about her. I worshipped her. Her photos on my walls were proof of that. There’s nothing wrong with loving someone possessively and obsessively… it only reveals the depth of yourlove. You would kill and die for them. I would have done both for Aria in a heartbeat. I’d already killed for her, and I felt bloody amazing doing it, too. Strangling that bitch to death… the rush was indescribable. All my rage and resentment… my darkness poured out of me and seeped into her lifeless body. Burying her had been a relief, as if I had buried my darkest demon with her before he would rise out of the grave and re-spawn. The most insidious part of me was now rotting away with that corpse. I had purified my darkness within like a divine alchemy, all in the name of justice. That’s what my rituals were,a cleansing…spiritual purge. A death and rebirth.
I didn’t regret killing Steph. She deserved to die. Anyone who hurt Aria deserved an agonizing death. She possessed my soul, and I did not know how that happened, but I couldn’t change it. No matter what it took, I had to be with her.
More than anything, I wanted to be inside her... making love to Aria would fill a void. It wouldn’t be empty sex. Yes, I wanted to take her in all positions… everywhere, anytime I wanted, but my heart would be in it from beginning to end. Once we’d consummate our love, Aria would own me, just like I would own her—forever. Loyalty. This is what it meant to love: here is my darkest of dark. Love me. Accept me.
One of my darkest fantasies was to penetrate her in her sleep. I was confident I could please her. I’d spread those thighs, rub my cock on that sweet, tight pussy and ram it in. She might even try to fight me off, but deep down, I’d know she’d want me. Women love to get their back blown out and manhandled. They act like they don’t want it, but they’re just lying to themselves. It’s the quiet ones who are usually thebiggestfreaks in the bedroom. The truth is, every woman loves a deep, hard, cock pounding. And the ones that say they don’t are muffin-munchers or too much of a prude to admit it.
Fuck, if only she knew how badly I wanted her. I’d kill that cocksucker sperm donor of hers if it made her happy, though I’d torture him first. I had been contemplating that for the past few weeks, and I knew exactly how I would orchestrate his murder. I needed proper preparation to take out that abusive prick. Someone had to do it. I was more than honored to be the one to carry out this divine justice on my niece’s behalf. That SOB had put her through enough. I planned to torture him first, until he would beg for death, only to resuscitate him and snuff out his existence.
