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Nick gave her a wry smile. ‘Sally is a good person. Just not the person for me.’ For the briefest of moments his eyes held hers and she read his sadness in them. Then he quickly looked away.
I’m sorry, she wanted to blurt. I love you. I did what I did not to hurt you, but to protect you from me. I ruin everything.
But she said none of those things. Now wasn’t the time to pour out her heart. Not when her brother was slipping away.
* * *
Nick stared down at his friend, tears pricking his eyes. Lizzie had left to get them a drink and, he thought, to allow him some time to say his own goodbye.
The nurses had told them Robert’s vital signs were worsening. It wouldn’t be long now.
‘So.’ His voice croaked and he wished he didn’t feel so horribly self-conscious. Wished he had Lizzie’s ease when it came to talking to her dying brother. ‘I guess it’s about time I came clean about my feelings for your little sister.’ He let out a strangled laugh. ‘You probably already guessed though, didn’t you, mate? You were always inviting me to every family event, making sure I was there whenever Lizzie came over from the States.’
A tear fell down his cheek, but Nick didn’t wipe it away. His mind wasn’t in the clinical looking room with the beeping monitors. It was back in England, with Robert. Back in the Donavue family home that Lizzie now owned, having officially bought it off him a few months ago. He didn’t know what he’d have done without Robert growing up. He’d given him not just laughs and excitement, not just friendship, but a family, too. And, Nick realised with a start, he’d given him Lizzie. Sure Nick himself had then managed to cock everything up, but he’d like to bet Robert had known exactly what he’d been doing all those years ago.
‘Thank you,’ he whispered, reaching out to clutch Robert’s thin hand. ‘You were the best friend a guy could have. And don’t you worry about your sister. I love her with everything I am. I’ll always look out for her. Always.’
By the time Lizzie came in with the drinks, tears were rolling freely down Nick’s face.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Lizzie liked to think that in the end, when he’d taken his final breath, Robert had known she and Nick were there with him. For all the times he’d been there for her, this was at least one thing she’d managed to do for him.
Now she was watching as the red velvet curtains in the crematorium were carefully pulled shut. The next time she would see Robert, he would be in an urn, his ashes ready to be taken back to England and scattered next to her parents’ grave. Later she knew she’d feel some sort of relief that his terrible ordeal was finally over, but for now there was only grief. It wasn’t the all-consuming agony she’d felt two years earlier, when she’d buried her parents. This time her grief was more hollow. Robert had gone, and with him the last remaining member of her once close, happy family. Even now, at his funeral, she couldn’t help but think of what might have been if she hadn’t insisted on going to America to model. If she’d gone to university in England instead, taken up a good, steady job like a teacher, would she still have them with her? Would Robert be alive, married, perhaps even a father? Anguish ripped through her and she had to shut her eyes against the pain.
A hand squeezed hers. ‘Are you okay?’
Nick’s kind eyes were filled with concern. She took in a shaky breath and nodded her head. With him by her side, she did almost feel okay. He’d been a tower of strength during the dark two days since Robert’s death. It was Nick who’d listed out what needed to be done, made the phone calls, advised on the service, held her when she’d broken down. Charlotte had helped, too, perhaps in more ways than she could’ve guessed. Having her with them had been a welcome bridge between her and Nick. Without Charlotte it might have been awkward. With her they were simply three close friends, coping as best they could through a difficult time.
After saying a final goodbye to Robert, they walked out into the sunlight.
‘Come on, let’s go out for lunch.’ Nick tugged at her hand, pulling her towards the car he’d hired. ‘Robert would have hated to see us so damned morose.’
He drove to a quiet place high in the hills. Lizzie put on her dark glasses, swept her blonde hair into her large black hat, and followed him and Charlotte into the restaurant. There, for a few precious hours, she relaxed. She’d even go as far as to say she had fun as they reminisced about their childhood. Nick made her laugh with tales of him and Robert, some of which she’d never heard before. But then, all too soon, it was time to leave.
‘Nick, be a darling and drop me off first please?’ Charlotte yawned as she climbed back into the car. ‘I’m pooped.’
‘Lightweight.’ But he did as she asked and then it was just her and Nick arriving back at her apartment.
‘Do you want to come in?’ she asked as he parked in the underground car park.
‘I wouldn’t mind a coffee.’
Wordlessly they travelled up in the lift. Without the buffer of Charlotte, the tension rose steadily between them and Lizzie found it harder and harder to breathe.
By the time the lift opened, she almost ran out, hastily unlocking her front door and retreating into the kitchen. There she shrugged off her jacket and grabbed at the kettle. She was reaching out to turn on the tap when Nick put his hand on her wrist.
‘When did these happen?’ he asked in a low, controlled voice, looking down at her bruises.
Damn. She’d taken care to wear long sleeves and keep them covered these last few days. ‘A while ago.’
A muscle in his jaw jumped. ‘How?’
She snatched her arm away. ‘It doesn’t matter.’
‘It matters,’ he repeated with deceptive softness. ‘Tell me how you got them, Lizzie.’
‘I was held a little too roughly. I told him and he let go.’ It was near enough to the truth.
