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"Stop it!" She pushed him hard enough to stumble out of his arms. Grabbing the robe, she ran from the room, before he could get to his feet. He heard the door of the bedroom slam shut.
He just sat there. He’d hurt her, because he was hurting. Tomorrow was their last day and they’d have to leave around noon because he had an urgent meeting to attend. He couldn’t stay any longer and it was killing him. He needed her in his bed, and was longing to wake up to her every single morning but it couldn’t happen.
He was pissed that he’d agreed to the secrecy. Now, he was in so deep, he couldn’t find his way out. Propping his elbows on his knees, he rubbed his hands over his face and felt the sharp pain inside his chest. He didn’t want to need her, but he damn well did and now he was going to have to grovel.
Chapter 5
She heard when he came in. She’d slammed into the room and without putting on any form of clothing had curled up on the bed, tears streaming down her face. Her life had always been easy.
She was beautiful and wealthy- her family was old and they had ties to royalty, if the story was true. At some point her ancestors had been slaves, of course, because of her skin color, but that had been a very long time ago. She was mixed, some white, some Indian thrown in. So, she’d grown up privileged.
Now, she’d fallen head over heels in love with a man who made her miserable and ecstatic at the same time, and she had no idea what to do.
She stiffened when she felt the bed move.
"I’m a moron and a dick. A dangerous combination." His deep voice was quiet and humble.
"I keep lashing out at you and have to apologize. I’m upset that I can’t be with you on a regular basis, but that's no excuse for my behavior." He paused and waited for her to comment. He knew she was crying, and had heard the sniffles when he came into the room. It pained him that he was the cause of it.
"Darling, talk to me, please. Say something. Tell me what a jerk I am." He waited again and she remained silent. Sighing deeply, he touched her shoulder and found her as stiff as a board. "Look at me."
When she refused, he turned her to face him and felt his heart wrench at the sight of her tear-stained face. "I don't deserve you." He whispered hoarsely.
"Leave me alone." She said stonily.
"You know I can’t do that." Lifting a hand, he wiped at the tears, ignoring her effort to resist him. "Forgive me."
"I hate you." She lied.
"I hate myself too." His fingers were gentle as they continued to wipe the moisture from her cheeks. "I’ve never lost control like that before. It seems like you bring out the best and worst in me. I was cold, emotionally, before I met you. I had to be in order to survive in my world.
But, since I met you, I have all these emotions churning inside me that I can’t control. I don't like to be out of control, Alessia. You have a hold over me that I can’t explain." Slipping off the soft bedroom shoes, he climbed in next to her and pulled her into his arms. "I’m sorry, baby."
"I don't care."
"You do." Tilting her chin up, he pressed his lips against hers. "I’m honored that you care. I’m going to try and deal with this. I will give you the time you need to tell him about us. No matter how bad it gets, I’ll try and make it work."
"Perhaps you’re right." There was a weariness to her tone that had the fear spiking inside his chest.
"What do you mean?" He demanded.
"You made some very good points." She took in a breath. "We’re so different. I was just here thinking that nothing bad had really happened to me except losing people. My mom and both paternal and maternal grandparents.
I was popular at school and I got good grades. I never had to suffer through anything. You’re the exact opposite. I can understand that, even if I can’t relate. I’m in love with you Maxwell, but even if Daddy accepted you, would it work between us? Are we going to last?"
"You want to leave me." He said dully. The thought of it was doing strange things to him. He couldn’t lose her. He’d never been in love before and he was willing to put up with the secrecy in order to be with her. He wasn’t used to all of it, but he would do anything, agree to anything, so that he could be with her.
"I don't want to." She whispered, seeing the panicked look on his handsome face. His was a rough beauty as if etched out of stone. His chin was strong and had a determination about it that was apparent. His hazel eyes had seen too much and he knew how to hide his feelings.
His body was lean and muscled with a leashed power that sent shivers of excitement and fear through her. Lifting a hand, she touched his unshaven jaw, her fingers light. "You keep pushing me away and I wonder if it’s for the best."
"No damn way." His fingers clamped around her wrist and bit into her soft skin. "I need you, and by God, I’ve never needed anyone before. I told myself that needing someone was a mistake and I never did. I never had anyone in my corner and that was fine. Until you."
Letting go of her hand, he hauled her on top of him. Her naked body sent heat straight to his core and it frustrated him how she controlled him. Her long lashes were spiked with tears. Her thick hair tumbled around her face and he felt the ache - the yearning for her.
"You’re not leaving me." Clamping a hand at the back of her head, he grabbed strands of her hair and brought her head down to his. "I won't let you."
"You keep hurting me and I can’t bear it." She whispered. Her body was already trembling. Beneath her, she could feel the play of muscles and his erection.
