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“I told you. He’s my tutor.”
“He didn’t leave last night.”
“We were up late preparing for the exam I took today.”
He grunted not taking his eyes off of me.
“By the way, I know you like her, but I don’t think it’s working out between Tasha and me.”
“Make it work. She’s good for you. Teams will like her.”
“I can’t be with someone because some team might like the way we look together. There’s more to life than that.”
“Do you know how much I sacrificed to get you where you are? You couldn’t even begin to guess.”
“And I appreciate that, Dad. But I don’t see what that has to do with who I date.”
“Don’t you go ruining this now, Boy.”
“I’m not ruining anything. I’m just telling you that she might not be the one.”
“And, who is?”
“I don’t know. But there are a lot of people out there.”
“And none of them would do what she can do for you.”
“You mean stand beside me on draft day and look pretty? I can’t base my life on one moment that will have more to do with how I play on Saturday than who I stick my dick in.”
“Don’t you ruin this, Boy.”
“I told you, don’t call me that.”
“I’ll call you whatever I God damn want, Boy.”
“Okay, I’m done,” I told him seeing where the conversation was headed.
“Don’t you walk away from me,” he said after I exited to my room and shut the door behind me.
“Don’t you fuck this up. Don’t you go fuckin’ this up, Boy. This is the best thing that will ever happen to you. Don’t you give it all up for some piece of ass.”
He had heard me. He knew what I was hinting at with Quin and it was clear that he didn’t approve. But, it didn’t matter. I was falling in love with him and there was nothing my dad could do to change that.
If Quin let me, I was going to make him mine. To others, it might seem like a choice, but it wasn’t. I didn’t think I could stand to be away from him if I tried. He had me and nothing that happened was going to change that. Not my father. Not what some scout would say. Nothing.
‘Did you get the tickets?’ I texted Quin as I sat in the locker room waiting to go out for the game.
“Put your phone away, Rucker. Get your head in the game,” Coach said forcing me to return it to my bag before I got a reply from Quin.
Holding out as long as I could, I stared at the screen until the phone was out of sight. Still nothing. I had texted him yesterday and he had told me he and Lou would be here. I told him that I would make sure to win the game so that he enjoyed himself. He had just told me that he was looking forward to it, but nothing else.
I was expecting more from him. The truth was that I was having a hard time interacting with him since our class ended. Our class had been our excuse to spend time together. Without it, the only thing remaining was my intense feelings for him. But I didn’t feel right expressing how I felt as long as I was still in a relationship with Tasha.
Tasha, on the other hand, was nowhere to be seen. I had put tickets for her at ‘Will Call’ like I always did, but I hadn’t spoken to her in days. I would say our relationship was over except even when she disappeared like this, she would reappear and remind me of the dream we had had where I traveled the country playing for the NFL and she got involved with some charity.
I don’t know what it was about that dream that always got me to excuse the shittiness of our relationship, but it did. It had to stop, though. I wasn’t sure what I wanted my life to be, but I was feeling more confident that it wasn’t that.
How did I break that to her? How did I break that to my dad?
