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“No. That’s not what we’re trying to tell you,” Cage explained. “We’re telling you that Quin is thinking about buying a house where we could all live. Mama would have a room. You would, too.”
“I could even get something with four bedrooms so that we could have somewhere for guests to sleep when they visit. I’m sure my parents would want to visit at some point. We’re going to need enough space for them too.”
“So, you’re just gonna buy a four-bedroom house so you two have somewhere to hook up every other weekend? Must be nice.”
I didn’t mean to be a prick to Quin about how rich he was. But as a guy who had to do some fuckin’ awful things to survive over the years, it was a tough pill to swallow.
“Don’t be an asshole, Nero. He’s offering us somewhere to live rent-free. Aren’t you tired of living in a place with no privacy? I mean, how did you even have girls over when you were growing up? The walls are paper thin.”
“I didn’t have girls over,” I told him not mentioning the main reason I hadn’t.
As much as I was into girls, the feelings I had had for boys had always messed with my head enough to force me to keep my distance from them. I’m sure I could have been with one if I wanted. There were plenty of girls who made that clear. And the fact that I didn’t act on any of those opportunities just added to my anger.
I couldn’t get myself to be with girls. I couldn’t get myself to be with guys. My mother was lost in her own world. I didn’t see a way I would ever be loved. That really fucked me up.
“Well, if you have a bedroom with a real door, maybe you could.”
I looked over at Quin. He clearly hadn’t mentioned the hints I had been dropping about my feelings towards guys. I knew that Quin had picked up on them. The guy was literally a genius.
The way I understand it, his parents did some sort of procedure to artificially conceive him and it made him one of the smartest people in the world. So, figuring out my closeted ass had to be like reading a pop-up book for him.
“You guys coming to my game on Saturday?”
Cage flinched at my change of topic.
“Of course.”
“The person they assigned me for that anger management program they put me in is gonna be there too. He doesn’t know much about football. Do you think you could, you know, explain things to him? I just don’t want him to be bored to death. I want him to have a good time.”
“No worries. We got you. How’s the program going, by the way?”
“I was a little nervous about it. But, it might work out?” I said thinking of Kendall.
“You seem happier,” Cage pointed out.
After he said that I realized I was smiling. “Maybe.”
“We’ll make sure he has a good time,” Cage agreed. “What’s his name?”
“Kendall.”
As soon as I said it I felt my cheeks heat up. They stared at me like my feelings for him were written on my face.
“Okay, yeah. We got you,” Cage said with a smile.
“Don’t worry about a thing,” Quin said telling me that Kendall would be in good hands.
Texting Kendall about his ticket, he replied with a simple, ‘Thank you.’ I was hoping for a little more. If he was still into me, wouldn’t he have at least wished me luck on the game?
I remembered what he said to me the night of the party. Drunk-Kendall had made clear that he wanted me. The same was true when we met up on Sunday before he found out I played football.
But, maybe that was no longer true. That motivated me even more to have the game of my life. I had to win him over. The only thing anyone ever liked about me was what I did on that field. I was going to get Kendall to like me.
Thinking I would be distracted entering the stadium for the game, I was wrong. I had never been more focused in my life. Titus, who was a bench warmer on the team, tried to talk to me. When I ignored him, he got the message and made sure I had my space.
Staring as our defensive team started the game, everything slowed down. I could see where everyone would move before they got there. So, when I took the field with the offense, I looked into the quarterback’s eyes. Immediately he understood.
Chapter 5
