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I was going through a hard time. I was appreciative that he was there for me. I told him that. He grunted something unintelligible and then got all twitchy. Like I said, he was being weird.
I really wished he wasn’t because it would have been nice to tell him everything that had just happened. How many horror stories had I shared with him about Evan Carter? How many times had I woke him up with my screaming? Well, stop the presses. Evan and I are good now!
Okay, we weren’t really good. But, I think I’m good. At least, I would be if it wasn’t for what Quin told me about Nero. I had to think of what I could do to help. Maybe what he needed was an intervention. But instead of dragging him off to rehab, it could be people telling him how much they loved him. They could all, person after person, repeat that they loved him and how happy they are to have him in their life.
I stopped walking and pressed my fingers against my eyes. What that reminded me of was that I couldn’t be one of those people. I could never be one of those people. I couldn’t love him the way I so desperately wanted to. Not if I was going to give him the help that he so clearly needed. We can’t all get what we want and the person who won’t be able to get it this time is…
Kneeling before I fell to the ground, I sat on my ass and cried. These weren’t like the tears I shed an hour ago. This time I knew why we weren’t going to be together and it was out of love. This was how I could prove to him that I loved him, by putting his needs over mine. And these weren’t just words and empty promises anymore. I knew what I needed to do… even if knowing didn’t make things easier.
I sat on the ground crying things out. It was a while before I was able to get up and continue to my room. By the time I got there, I felt better. Okay, I didn’t feel better, but I did feel stronger.
“Hey,” I said to Cory who ended up being home.
“Hey,” he said still not able to look me in the eyes.
“This is ridiculous, Cory, and has to stop. So, you had an erection. So, your erection touched my butt. Are you so insecure that you’re gonna let a little homoerotic cuddling ruin our friendship? Things happen! I mean how homophobic are you?”
“Kendall, I’m not straight!” He said cutting me off.
I paused to make sure I heard what I did.
“I’m sorry, what?”
“I’m not straight. I’ve always suspected something was different about me. But, I’ve been with Kelly for so long that I didn’t think it would be an issue. I didn’t think I would have to deal with it. But, I can’t deny it anymore. I’m not straight,” he said looking at me with his big puppy dog eyes.
I stared at Cory not saying a word. A part of me was shocked by the news. Another part screamed, ‘I knew it!’ But, I also knew there was a certain way I was supposed to handle this. After all, wasn’t he coming out to me? I was a gay guy. I was supposed to be good at this stuff.
“Aren’t you gonna say anything?” He asked.
Having waited far too long to speak, I knew there was only one thing I could do. So, I walked up to him, threw my arms around him, and squeezed.
“I’ll be here for you. Whatever you need,” I told him meaning it.
“Thank you.”
I let him go and held his shoulders in my hands.
“So, what narrative are we going with? Are we gonna say that cuddling with me turned you? Or…?” I asked with a smirk.
Cory laughed. It was good to see him smile again. At least one of us was happy.
“You wish,” he said cheering up.
“I mean, if you were single, maybe.”
“Oh!” Cory said suddenly becoming serious.
“But, you’re not!” I reminded him. “And I’m having a crisis with the guy I was supposed to be with, but am not, apparently.”
“What’s going on?”
Telling Cory everything that had happened since the last time we spoke took the rest of the day. When it became dark outside and I still hadn’t heard from Quin, I texted him.
‘Any word yet?’
‘Nothing. He didn’t attend practice. Everyone’s still looking.’
“This is insane. Where could he have gone?”
