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“I assure you, we were just friends,” I said clearing up any misunderstandings. Both Titus and Cali had boyfriends, so I always felt the need to remind them that I was the straight brother.
“Doesn’t sound like it,” Titus teased.
“That’s all we were. Though…”
I faded off.
“Don’t leave me hanging.”
“He and I were best friends. And there might have been a few times when he gave me the impression that he was attracted to me.”
“Really? And how did you feel about him?”
“He was a friend. That’s how I felt about him.”
“So, this long lost friend, who you haven’t talk to in how long?”
“Since I left school.”
“This long lost friend who might have been into you, and who you haven’t talk to in two years, shows up at your place of work trying to win you back.”
“It wasn’t like that.”
“Are you sure? Because that’s what it sounds like.”
I thought about that for a moment. Titus didn’t have all of the information, but was he wrong? There had been times when Merri and I were hanging out that I had caught him staring at me. It had happened more than once.
Knowing him and the circles he traveled in, I had dismissed it as him being awkward. Merri could definitely be awkward on occasion. But if he had been into me, could his invitation to workout for the team be something else? Was the workout even real?
“I don’t know,” I told Titus honestly.
“Well, I don’t know him. But I know you. And I know that you don’t know the effect you have on people. If there is a long lost best friend who has shown up out of nowhere trying to win you back, I would say, be careful.
“And, do you even want to be involved in football again? It couldn’t have meant that much to you considering this is the first time you’re bringing it up.”
“It had its moments.”
“Be careful. You might not think so, but this sounds like it has more to do with him getting into your pants than him offering you some generic football position. This sounds questionable as hell. I mean, is there really even a job?”
“Maybe you’re right.”
“As a guy who spent most of my life in the closet, I’m telling you I am. Unless you’re looking for your first gay experience, I say pretend it never happened… And I’m not just saying that because you’re my business partner and I couldn’t run the business without you.”
I smiled. “Of course not. Your advice isn’t biased at all.”
“Seriously, though. It sounds like there’s more to the story than you know.”
“Got it. And you’re right. It does seem like there’s more to the story. Maybe I’ll let it go. Thanks, Titus.”
“You’re welcome, Bro. That’s what I’m here for.”
“I’ll see you this weekend.”
Ending the call, I considered what Titus had said. He was right about one thing. There was more to the story. Did Merri have an ulterior motive? I had always known him to be a straight forward guy. One of the things I liked best about him was that I had felt like I could trust him. That is until I couldn’t.
So, did I entertain what Merri was offering? And, what exactly was he offering? When we were at school, I thought that Merri was a friend I would have for the rest of my life. He was the one guy I felt like I could be myself with.
It had been because of him that I had the success on the team that I did. In high school I had always felt the need to keep a low profile. I was the only black kid in the school and on the team. The best thing I could have done was blend in.
