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That doesn’t sound very promising.
“But I think I can get around it. I’ve been thinking how you, uh...” He sticks his tongue out. “How you ate it, and that made it permanent. Maybe if I put itinsidesomething, something you could keep close... I haven’t figured that out yet. But if you let me use those other worms you found, I will.”
I don’t have to think twice about it. “You can have them.” I pull the other worms from my pocket and this time, Graz gingerly takes them.
“Amazing. This stuff, I’ve never seen anything like it.” His big grin is even wider. “When you’re done with your little human there, I want you to show me where this pyramid was. Maybe I can still dig up some of the magic you found at the bottom. You’re going to have to leave Kalishagg anyway—Gusak will find you eventually.”
“I know.”When I’m done with my little human,I think sadly.
Lo’zar?It’s Rimi’s small voice.When you’re done with me?
Shit. I forgot that I need to control my inner thoughts—and what I broadcast to her. I thought she was asleep.
It was something Graz said, I try to assure her.
I see. She doesn’t say anything else after that.
“I need some sleep,” Graz grumbles. “Don’t go anywhere, okay?”
After he’s gone to bed and fallen into a deep slumber, Rimi emerges from the other room and crouches down by the fire, a little distance away from me. Her shoulders are hunched tight.
She hasn’t forgotten what I said earlier, and I don’t know if telling her that I didn’t mean it will work.
Rimi.She twitches a little, but otherwise doesn’t acknowledge that I’m talking.I’m sorry. It’s not what it sounded like.I inhale deeply. I just want to put my arm around her, but I expect she won’t take it well now that I’ve upset her.I’ll never be done with you.I almost slip up and tell her the truth: that it’s impossible. That I’m tied to her now.You... You mean everything to me, princess.
The tension in her back softens, just a tiny bit. I crab-walk two steps towards her, and nudge her with my shoulder.
I’m too good of a fuck for that, huh?she asks, and it’s both salty and sweet. She doesn’t forgive me yet, but she likes me too much to be mad at me.
Right. It’s only the fucking that keeps me around.I run a hand down her back, just wanting to touch her, to assure her that she’s the only reason my heart is still beating. She leans into me and lets out a sad sigh.
What is it?I ask.What really upset you?
I keep thinking about ‘after.’I can feel it in my own body when her pulse speeds up.What will you do after me? And someday, who else will be in your life?She shivers.I can’t stop thinking about that.
Who else?I’m mystified by this.There won’t be anyone else.
Rimi’s eyes narrow.Of course there will be. You’re handsome, and funny, and good in bed—
I cut her off.No. Don’t even say it.I can’t fathom being inside anyone but my princess. I would never be able to bring myself to care the way I care about her. If I did fuck someone else... I would always imagine her, instead.
Lo’zar.Rimi takes my hand and twines her five fingers with my four.You will have to move on.
The thought of it is a hot brand burning into my chest. I will never move on. At that moment, I almost tell her—that she’s my mate, my everything. She cares about me, I know, but she wants to go home. Sheneedsto go home, where she’s safe.
So I stop myself and simply hold her hand. I will just have to live the rest of my life feeling what she feels from across the world.
Chapter19
Rimi
My words wounded him, I can tell. But just like he can’t live in my world, neither can I live in his. I will only make things harder for him, a human and a trollkin traveling together. He won’t be able to stay under his former clan’s radar with me clinging to his side, and then he’ll have to look after me as well as himself. And who knows what my parents think has become of me? Maybe I’ve been a burden to them my whole life, but I’d be an even bigger one on Lo’zar.
A little later in the day, I get up to move my body around. I remember what my troll taught me and start the fire. It’s not long before he emerges from the bedroom, yawning and stretching. I love his long, lanky limbs, all covered in lean muscle. I remember how they carried me across the jungle, and I love the way they bind me up tight when we’re sleeping.
I should get some more food, Lo’zar says. His voice is missing its usual air of confidence.Graz doesn’t have much, and I don’t want to eat everything he’s got.
That seems like a bad idea to me, what with his boss’s goons out looking for him.You shouldn’t. What if you’re caught?
