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“Thankyou for meeting with us again.” Jules glanced over at her husband, who gave a nod of encouragement.
“Of course.” Dr. Navi stacked his hands on the patient folder in the center of his desk. “Have you had any additional seizures? Are the headaches worsening?”
“No. The…the…from the drugstore—” She looked at Ben for help and he whispered, “Medication.”
“The medication seems to be working.” She looked at the list of questions she and Ben had assembled after her session with Marisol and their “discussion.” “I was in shock after hearing the diagnosis and needed some time to get my head around the implications.” She grimaced at the unintended pun.
“Perfectly understandable.” Dr. Navi waited for her to continue.
“I need to understand what’s happening to my body,” Jules said. “Everything. What is happening and what could happen. Right now, and after you remove the tumor. I need to prepare for the worst and…”
“…and hope for the best,” she and Ben said in unison.
“Mrs. Rosner, there are no guarantees in medicine, especially when it applies to an organ as delicate as the brain.” Dr. Navi’s serious expression softened. “But in your case, I’m optimistic. Although we weren’t able to complete an MRI with contrast for a detailed visual on your tumor because of the pregnancy, I’m certain it’s an astrocytoma. They are aggressive, but relatively slow-growing. I’ve been in contact with Dr. Kettner, and we’d like to get you to at least thirty-six weeks. How far along are you?”
Jules’ mind went blank. She stared down at her rounded belly, searching her brain for a number.
“Thirty-two weeks and three days,” Ben supplied.
“Thirty-eight would be ideal, but this is a time-sensitive situation.” Dr. Navi seemed oblivious to her memory lapse. “I’ll monitor you via twice-monthly neurological evaluations, and Dr. Kettner will monitor the baby.”
“Wait.” Ben laid a small tape recorder on the corner of the desk. “Can I record this so Jules can play it back…if she forgets what you said?”
Dr. Navi frowned, then nodded. “Please understand this is subject to change. What I outline here is based on what we know today. Any change in your condition or the pregnancy may require a different course of action.”
“Understood.” Ben clicked on the recorder. “If everything goes according to plan?”
“You’ll deliver via C-section, and then we’ll schedule an MRI with contrast,” Dr. Navi spoke as if discussing something minor, like filling a cavity. It both irked and comforted Jules. “Then surgery. With luck, we’ll be able to remove the entire tumor. The usual protocol includes radiation and/or chemotherapy. Sometimes medication is required, which may preclude nursing although you could pump milk and freeze it or reach out to a breast milk bank if that’s a concern for you.
“After the craniotomy, you may experience mild pain, fatigue, and headaches. A postoperative MRI will be performed to ascertain if the entire tumor was removed. If not, additional surgery may be required. There can be ongoing complications such as memory loss, forgetfulness, balance and motor-skill issues, and headaches. You will return for MRIs every three months after the surgery until you’re declared in remission, at which time we will see you every two years.”
“This isn’t a death sentence then?” Jules held her breath.
Dr. Navi turned to his keyboard and typed in something, eyes scanning text on the screen. “The five-year survival rate is 96%,” he announced. “Mrs. Rosner, Mr. Rosner. I know a diagnosis like this is overwhelming and alarming, but it does not mean your life is over. I deal with hundreds of patients every year who go on to have active, happy, meaningful lives.”
“Thank you for the encouragement.” Ben shifted, as if to stand.
“One more thing.” Jules gave her husband an apologetic glance. She looked down at the list and the top line, circled in red. “Right now, the memory loss is more of an issue than headaches…or anything else. Is there anything we can do about that?”
“The tumor is pressing on the frontal lobe,” Dr. Navi said. “Until we remove it, the memory loss will continue. Probably even worsen.”
Ben rested his palm against her shoulder, but it didn’t ease the sorrow weighing down her shoulders. She’d waited her entire life to be pregnant. This would probably be her only pregnancy. And a brain tumor was stealing all the precious memories she’d counted on having to look back on.
What demonic force had been listening in when she said she would sacrifice anything to be a mother?
* * *
“You didgreat at Dr. Navi’s office today.” Ben sat down on the sofa and pulled Jules into his arms.
She’d been curled up under a light blanket, napping, when he arrived home from the shop. He got a quick shower and then put a pan of lasagna in the oven that his mother had dropped off earlier in the day. Now she was awake, looking around in confusion.
“Is it morning?” she asked.
The early evening light was murky, so he switched on a lamp. “Eight p.m., not a.m.”
“When did we go to the doctor?”
“This morning. We met with Dr. Navi.” He brushed away a strand of hair caught in her eyelashes.
