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“What’s happening with Gina now?”.”
“She’ll be in the hospital for quite some time. They’re continuing with her treatment, but it won’t be enough. The doctor said that eventually, there’ll be nothing they can do. The crazy thing is, I didn’t know Gina had heart problems. She never told me,” she stutters, and my heart goes out to her. “She has the same defect that took my mom. I didn’t know she would need this type of surgery, and I spent the money from the auction to pay the arrears on a loan she got for me.”
That’s the loan where the bulk of the money came from the loan shark.
“What was that loan for? It seems you had a lot of money left to pay.” It’s best I act like I don’t know anything.
“Yes. My ex-fiancé got me in some trouble I couldn’t get out of myself.”
My jaw tightens, clenching. “What kind of trouble did he get you in?”
Her hands tremble, the tell-tale sign of deep psychological stress. “There was a lot of stuff, and I… he…” Her voice fades into nothing, making me think that she must have gone through a lot worse than I imagined.
“What did he do to you, River?”
She shakes her head, and the tremor ripples through her body. “I... um, can’t talk about him now.” Her voice chokes, and she pulls in a deep breath.
I want to press her for more information but decide against it because I’ve seen this type of reaction in women before when they’ve been abused.
That word in my head in relation to my girl makes me see red.
My girl…
I keep needing to check myself when I think of her as mine. She’s not and hasn’t been in a long time, but there are parts of her that will always belong to me, and I hate that I wasn’t there for her when she needed me.
That hatred makes me want to find her motherfucking ex and skin him alive, then kill him for hurting her, but I’ll deal with his ass later. Getting worked up right now won’t help her.
I wonder what her father thought of this ex. Neil hated me, but I would have never hurt his daughter.
“Okay.” I try to keep my voice calm for her sake. “You don’t have to talk about him.”
“Thanks.” She presses her hand to her mouth and wipes away more tears. “I came to you because I don’t want to go back to the man who gave Gina the loan. He’s not a good person. But I’ll go to him if I have to.”
As in, if I say no, which I’m not. There’s no fucking way I’m allowing her to go back to some loan shark, and there’s no way I’m not helping.
“I don’t know why you suddenly need a wife, but it’s the only thing I know that you need. It would help both of us.” She pauses for a moment, and I realize she’s suggesting it from this angle because she doesn’t want to owe me. She doesn’t want a handout from me. Maybe she also knows I would never allow Gina to die and am a breath away from depositing the money she needs for the surgery, even without getting anything in return.
“If you pick me, I’ll do what you need me to do for as long as you want.” She stares me dead in the eye as if she’s about to fight.
Her words stick to my mind like tar, and I consider this new possibility.
Her—River St. James being my wife.
Of everyoneanyonecould possibly come up with as a good candidate, she’d make the perfect temporary wife. River might be wrong about me not wanting to be with her, but she’s right about the other stuff. I know her, and I do trust her. My trust doesn’t come easy, and I trust very few people in this world.
She’s one of them, whether I want her to be or not. I trust her enough to take my secret plot to the grave, but this idea… it’s bad for all sorts of reasons.
Number one being that I shouldn’t be with her.
However, my selfish mind is already running wild, wanting to hold on to the idea that I could be with her. After all, she’s offering herself to me—offering to be my fake wife.
God knows I do need the kind of help she could give me.
“You’re just staring at me.” River presses her lips together. “I need some kind of an answer, even if it’s a no.”
“I have to think about it.” I can’t believe I just said that, but if I don’t think, I’ll listen to my dick and agree in a heartbeat, shoving away all the parts to this request I need to consider.
That numb look I’ve seen twice before invades her expression and posture. The first time I saw her look like this was when I broke up with her. The next time was Saturday when I had to stop myself from consuming her.
