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“Stop looking at me like that,” I mutter, looking away from him.
“Like what?”
“Like I’m broken. I’m not.” My voice is raspy due to the swelling in my throat.
“No, of course not. Our doll isn’t—”
He might as well have pushed the detonate button. Anger surges forward, and a trembling starts in my body. I yank my hand away and glare at him.
“I’m not your doll!” My loud outburst surprises Jason, who blinks and steps back. “This happened today because you guys won’t get it through your head that I’m not a toy. You think that you can control me and tell me what to do, but you can’t. I’m a goddamn person, Jason!”
He opens and shuts his mouth, clearly taken back by my outburst. But I’m not done.
“I’ve been looking over my shoulder for years after what I did to Joey, and then to Jackie. I’m tired of being scared that I’m going to end up losing everything. Just when I thought I was in the clear, you guys come and threaten my whole life in a completely different way. I’mdone, Jason. Maybe I deserve what happened today, maybe I don’t. But I’m done dealing with karma. I’m walking away.”
“Look, dol- Briella,” Jason says quickly, his eyes darting to the door before flickering back to me. “Let’s talk about this later when—”
“When there’s no one else around so you can punish me further?” I interrupt sharply. I shake my head gingerly. “No, let’s do this now. Carry the news back to the others for me since I’m not goinghomewith you. When you go to the library tomorrow, you’ll need to find my boss, Ms. Barbara. You met her, remember? You were under the desk when she approached me. Give her my emails. She’ll take them to the dean and handle me appropriately. I’m not playing games anymore.”
I wince as the pain in my ribs flare to life. Biting back a sound of distress, I shift on the bed again, seeking some sort of relief. The pain medication they gave me is starting to fade.
“We’re not going to go to your boss, Bri,” Jason says quietly, keeping his voice low.
Moving closer to the bed, Jason reaches up and touches my good shoulder. My traitorous heart flutters. But it lacks the energy it once did. That organ is nearly as over this as the rest of me is. Thank goodness.
“And we’re not going to tell anyone what happened this morning.” His grip on my shoulder tightens as he stares down at me. His eyes slide over my face, his mouth pinching together. “There’s a lot we need to talk about, but you need to know—”
“Hello? Miss Wilson?”
Both Jason and I look toward the door to find an older man with brown skin and a white goatee walking in. He nods to Jason but comes up to me.
“I’m Doctor Shawnee, I’m here to go over your discharge paperwork, but I want to talk to you about a few things before I let you go. Is that ok?” he asks gently.
I nod, and then turn to Jason. His eyes meet mine as he reaches out to take my hand again. I pull away once more.
“You can go now.” My voice is deadpan.
Jason’s jaw clenches and his nostrils flare. I’m sure he’d love to object but given that we’re not family and he’s just been dismissed in front of the doctor, he has no power here. It’s the smallest of victories, but a victory nonetheless.
“I’ll be out in the waiting room.” Before I can tell him to go back to the others, he leaves the room, his shoulders hunched over and his head down.
Rolling my eyes, I turn to the doctor and force a smile.
“Alright, let’s talk.”
Thirty-Two
Running.
I guess that’s my best quality. With my swift departure from the hospital, Groveton, and then from the west side of Texas, I’ve managed to evade any trouble and then some.
My newest accommodations are much more preferable than the last place I slept in. Here, in Pianna’s apartment, tucked away in her guest room, I’m safe and surrounded by things that remind me of my best friend while she’s at work.
Laying here, drifting in a drug-induced haze thanks to the prescriptions the hospital gave me before my hasty departure, I take note of the paper flowers that Pianna created stapled around the small window. She used to make those all the time as a child when she needed to think. It’s nice to know she hasn’t grown bored with this hobby. The room is filled with the musky scent of incense that she keeps burning all day long. I used to hate the smell of it, but there’s something familiar in the scent now that makes me feel like I’m home.
So I take deep breaths. Sometimes, the deep breathing lulls me into a fitful sleep. Other times, it simply clears my mind of the chaos there. I’m grateful for both instances, which happen often the first two days under Pianna’s roof. A few times when I wake up, I find Pianna there next to me. She gives me ice to press against my face, soup, crackers that she purposely makes soggy so I can chew without pain, and she double checks to make sure I’m taking the proper medication. By the third day, I’m feeling well enough to soak in the clawfoot tub in Pianna’s master bathroom. That’s where I am when she finds me after her shift at work Wednesday night.
“Hey, how are you feeling?” she asks, stepping into the steam-filled bathroom.
