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A smiled curved her lips as she remembered Blake showing her how to start one yesterday. It had been easy enough, but the way he explained it to her, like he wanted to make sure she knew the make-up of the best wood that would burn and the length it should burn for, had her feeling light.
Something about his presence eased the whirlwind of emotion that constantly consumed her.
Every time he looked at her, butterflies started inside her. Warmth grew at the small, comforting touches he gave her. All of it made her feel whole, like a human and not just a being floating around a world she didn’t fit in. He made her think of other things, things that didn’t have her crying and wishing things would be different.
Poppy couldn’t say when that feeling between them changed, but it had definitely shifted. He was her rock, her shoulder to cry on, and he never turned away when she needed him. He helped her in more ways than he would ever know.
While in his presence, talking to him, laughing with him, Poppy found herself not thinking of Jon. The guilt from those thoughts kept her pushing her emotions down. If she were honest, her feelings for Blake were starting to change and go into territory she wasn’t comfortable with.
She closed her eyes. It seemed to keep her grounded, to ease her in some way. Poppy opened her eyes and looked down. She gripped the edge of her shirt and slowly dragged it over her stomach. Her belly was slightly rounded, thanks to her putting her weight back on, and she ran her hands over the scar that made a long, raised vertical line two inches from her belly button.
The damage had been repaired on the inside, but she now wore a permanent, physical reminder of that day. Poppy dropped her shirt until it covered her stomach, and she watched the fire.
The sound of a car engine coming up the drive had her standing and going to the window. Maggie’s Blazer parked parallel to the cabin, letting Poppy see into the cab without the glare of the headlights. Blake’s big form seemed to take up the entire passenger side. They were talking, and from the smile on Maggie’s face, the conversation obviously pleased her. Poppy wasn’t blind or stupid. The desire for Blake on Maggie’s face was clear as day, but a sick, twisted part of her couldn’t deny the pleasure that formed inside her when she noticed Blake didn’t seem to reciprocate Maggie’s feelings.
Maggie touched his bicep, and Poppy knew watching them was an invasion of their privacy, but she couldn’t force herself to move away. A tingle of jealousy worked its way through her body when Blake turned and faced Maggie.
His hand landed on hers, and Poppy’s stomach tightened. Her emotions were completely misplaced, yet she had to keep watching, like some kind of masochistic fiend.
What would your families think if they knew your feelings for Blake were becoming more than innocent?
No doubt, they would be disgusted, and Poppy couldn’t blame them. She disgusted herself.
Maggie leaned in and kissed him, and that was when Poppy forced herself to turn away. She moved to Alaska to heal, not to start something completely inappropriate with her brother-in-law. She made herself comfortable on the couch and grabbed her book. The story was about a young girl who faced horror after horror in her life. From abuse to ridicule, the young girl turned into a woman who constantly sought out love and affection in the wrong places.
Losing someone you loved was a true horror, but stories like the one she read made Poppy realize her life could be so much worse. She should be grateful for what she still had.
Chapter 10
Blake opened the front door and shut it once he was inside. He leaned against the wood and closed his eyes. He should have known Maggie driving him home was a bad idea. It was clear she had a different mindset from his. Her feelings for him were far more involved than he initially thought.
That much became uncomfortably clear when she told him how she felt before he got out of the Blazer. He had tried to explain that, yes, they had shared something six months ago, yet he would just like to keep their relationship professional, but then she kissed him.
A flicker of emotion passed across her face when he explained again that things couldn’t go there between them, that he had too much going on in his life and she deserved someone who could give her the time and attention she deserved. For the hundredth time, he cursed his weakness that had resulted in a now complicated situation with Maggie.
The sound of the fire crackling drew him away from his problems, and of course he started thinking about Poppy. God, if his life wasn’t complicated enough, he had feelings for her. No doubt she would see him as a sick bastard. That’s the way he saw himself anyway. What kind of man lusted after the woman who had been married to his little brother?
He scrubbed a hand over his face and pushed off the door. No, he needed to remember Poppy had come here to get away from the drama that now surrounded her life. He certainly didn’t want to complicate that by confessing that talking and spending time with her had healed him in more ways than one. He was all kinds of fucked up.
He went into the living room and saw Poppy lying on the couch, a book in her lap. Again, he found himself standing back and staring at her. He loved the way she played with the ends of her hair and the way her little nose scrunched up when she was deep in thought.
Every little mannerism was like a kick in his gut and a tight fist around his heart. When had the brotherly love he had for Poppy turned into something deeper?
“That’s an incredible book.” He moved into the room and sat on the couch beside her but made sure to leave a good space between them. She shifted in her seat and looked uncomfortable. Blake felt his brows knit. “Everything okay?”
Poppy ran her hand over the page and nodded. “Yeah.” She cleared her throat. “Everything’s good.” She smiled up at him. “You’re right; this is an incredible book.” She marked her page and closed the book. The title,She’s Come Undone, explained the story perfectly. Blake noticed the way she wouldn’t look at him.
“Hey.” He reached for her, but she stood and shook her head. “Poppy?” Worry started to eat at him. Had something happened? Did she get hurt? He scanned her body but couldn’t see anything that would suggest she was in pain. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
“Nothing, nothing.” She walked over to the bookshelf and slid the book in the empty spot. “I’m not making things hard for you, am I?”
What?“Hard for me? What do you mean?”
She leaned against the bookcase and wrapped her arms around her middle. “I don’t know.” She shrugged and looked away. “I mean, I packed up my life and moved up here. You’ve given me a place to live and a job—”
“Poppy, come here.” He moved over an inch and gestured her over. He could see the indecision on her face and wondered what had gotten into her. Had she sensed where his feelings were with her? Had he been that transparent with them? It would certainly explain her need for distance, and that had him feeling uncomfortable. The last thing he wanted was to put distance between them.
When she sat beside him, he stared at her profile. The gentle dip of her nose and petite bow of her lips drew him to her like the fire licking across the wood. “Why all these doubts all of a sudden? If I’ve made you feel uncomfortable in any way, you know you can tell me. I promise that wasn’t my intention.” The slender column of her throat worked as she swallowed. “I love having you here.” Her smile was slow, hesitant as it moved across her face, and his heart increased at the sight.
