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I step into the bedroom with a towel wrapped around my middle and another one drying my hair.
My feet come to a halt when I don’t find Nikolai waiting. Usually, he’d be doing push-ups, punching the air, or pacing like a caged lion.
Though he did say he’d take a shower in the second bathroom down the hall. Maybe he also takes long showers.
I put on a pair of his shorts and a gray T-shirt, then pause when his cologne fills my nostrils. My fingers bunch the cloth and I lift it to my nose to drag in a long inhale.
For some reason, his rich, masculine scent has a calming effect on me.
Hehas a calming effect on me.
I linger in the bedroom and stare at the bed. Earlier, I made him help me change the sheets as he grumbled about my OCD, but now, I can’t help thinking about the fact that I’m staying the night.
What do people do in these situations? I’ve never stayed the night with anyone before. It’s just not me.
I loathe the idea of being too close, of letting myself too loose.
But I guess I’ll have to cope for Nikolai.
I’m terrified that once he cracks me open, he’ll find me revolting. He’ll see me as I see myself in the mirror—as a black hole of nothingness.
I want to run and hide, but that means losing him.
So I stay.
It’s the least I can do.
Better pray he doesn’t finally see you for the basket case you truly are.
I try to ignore that voice as I walk out of the bedroom. Should I go check on him in the shower?
Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s punching the air as if it’s his demons. I just want to make sure he’s okay, considering he falls asleep in weird positions.
My steps are silent as I walk down the hall and knock on the bathroom door. “Nikolai?”
No answer.
I knock again. “Is everything okay?”
Nothing.
My breaths are choppy as I grab the doorknob. “I’m coming in.”
My heart nearly hits the floor when I find the water flowing out of the Jacuzzi bathtub and Nikolai submerged.
No, no, no…
A ringing floods my ears as I run toward him, drop to my knees, and thrust my hands into the water to grab his shoulders.
I should’ve checked on him earlier. If anything happens to him, I’ll never forgive myself—
His eyes pop open and he grins, then speaks in the water, bubbles erupting everywhere before he lifts his head.
I fall to my arse, air leaving me in long doses. Jesus Christ. Why does it feel like I just died and was resurrected?
“Lotus flower? What are you doing here? Oh! Wanna join me?”
“Why the fuck—” I cut myself off and speak in a calmer tone. “Why were you underwater?”
