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Laney stood on the porch outside the kitchen door, watching as her family headed off to do their last minute shopping. She could have gone with them after all, because she’d woken early and had already submitted her blog posts for the upcoming week and scheduled a few tweets about the children who would benefit from the New Year’s Eve gala, but after the non-stop chatter about Lego and video games over breakfast, she decided to stick with her original plan. Remembering the bag of presents she’d left in her car the day before, she moved down the steps. The snow crunched under her feet, bright white under the clear winter sky. She pressed a button on her key fob and the car doors unlocked with a loud click. She paused for a moment, taking in the utter stillness of winter farm life. It pleased her. Chicago was always so busy. Noisy.
Maybe she needed to buy a cottage.
As she gazed across the front forty acres, a silver pickup truck pulled up to the old school house. She stopped and watched as Kyle hopped out. He was 300 yards away, but she knew it was him. He started toward his little house, but then stopped and turned. Was he looking at her? Could he see her if she didn’t move? She raised her hand to give a tentative wave. It took a moment, but he waved back, then went inside.
She did the same. Her heart was racing and she knew her face was flushed. She shoved the presents under the Christmas tree and paced to the kitchen. She looked at the door. Her keys were hanging on a hook between the door and the window. A lump formed in her throat. What was she thinking? Good lord, what was she feeling? She wanted to see him again, up close this time. She shivered as raw desire rolled through her body. The open invitation to go over and be with him, just for a little while, was irresistible. She was nineteen again, making excuses to spend time with her sister’s friends, desperate to feel the prickly sensation of his very nearness.
Don’t do this. You’re just going to get hurt. She stood there for a few minutes, having an internal battle royale. Going over to his house would open Pandora’s box. Didn’t Evie flip that latch already?
If she was honest, it wasn’t Evie’s fault. The conversation with Rick had played over and over in her head on the drive from Chicago. Since when was she so cavalier with other people’s feelings? She might not like emotions herself, but they were important to others. Maybe she did need to talk to Kyle, figure out why she felt so much about him and not enough about others. Find some balance, or at the very least, closure.
Mind made up, heart pounding, she grabbed her keys and headed out the door before she lost her courage.
Kyle put the groceries away and started a pot of coffee. It had taken all of his self-control not to jump back in the truck after that tentative wave. He had to wait until she was ready to talk. If she wanted to, she’d come to him. The crunch of tires on snow caused something deep in his gut to clench and he moved to the front door, narrowly beating Buddy. The border collie knew better than to bark, but he seemed to think it was his responsibility to screen all visitors. Kyle had come to love that about his furry roommate, but this particular guest he wanted all to himself. He snapped his fingers and pointed to the dog bed next to the wood stove.
Her footsteps stopped outside the entrance. He wouldn’t let her chicken out. If she turned and walked away, he’d open the door, but he wanted her to be brave and knock. It took long enough that he knew she was nervous, but finally, two short taps announced her presence. He let out a deep breath, squared his shoulders, and opened the door with a welcoming smile.
“Hey...” Laney trailed off, glancing over her shoulder. “I saw you come home.”
He nodded. “Want to come in?”
“Sure. Thanks.” She stepped inside and took a tentative look around.
“Did you ever come in here before?”
“Once, as a teenager. It had been standing empty for a while at that point.”
“It’s a bit of a work in progress. I’m doing most of it myself, so it’s slow going.”
“It’s nice, I like what you’ve done.” She wrapped her arms around herself. Was she cold, or nervous? Probably both. The small talk felt weird.
Kyle stepped back to both gesture to the new kitchen space behind him, and to give her some room. “Do you want some coffee?” She nodded. “I just put on a pot.”
Laney followed him into the open concept kitchen he had installed in one corner of the large open room. The refinished hardwood floors connected it to the rest of the space, but the dark espresso cabinets, granite countertops and stainless steel appliances stood out. He knew it was impressive, and he wasn’t above strutting a bit for the girl who left Wardham to find success.
He turned to ask if she still took her coffee with lots of milk and sugar, but the words caught in his throat. Laney had shrugged off her coat and boots, and she was standing in his kitchen, looking at the photos stuck to the side of his refrigerator. She wore white socks, black yoga pants and an oversized white sweater which had slipped off one shoulder, revealing a thin elastic camisole strap. She looked perfectly at home, like they’d just had breakfast and were about to curl up on the couch and read together. Longing shot through Kyle’s gut before he could brace himself against it. His roving gaze halted at the creamy expanse of skin between her shoulder and delicate jaw, his eyes devouring the shadow beneath her chin, the hollow at the base of her neck, the faint blue blood vessels tracing across the top of her chest. Her skin there was nearly translucent, and his fingers itched, remembering the bounce of her pulse, how warm and responsive she was under his touch.
No good would come of wanting her. But it couldn’t be helped.
Chapter 5
Laney didn’t know who most of the people in the photographs were, but she stood there looking at them because she wasn’t ready to look at Kyle yet. She hadn’t expected his house to be such a home. For him to be so settled. So happy. When she wasn’t, not really. She was satisfied with her life, and she loved her job, but there was still something missing. She hadn’t made many friends yet in Chicago, something she would have to work on in the spring. She licked her lips and re-focused on the photos. She recognized Kyle’s older brother Ian in a few of them, with a beautiful, curvy redhead and two small children. Other photos featured similar young families, probably friends Kyle had made after college. The top row of pictures featured his parents and younger sister. The middle photograph was larger than the others, and it looked like something out of a magazine.
“That’s a nice picture of your whole family,” Laney said quietly, keeping her eyes glued to the fridge. The other photos overlapped it slightly, but she could tell there was a brunette standing next to Kyle and faint jealousy pulsed in her chest.
The floor squeaked as he took a step toward her. “My mom hired a professional photographer to come out to their farm. That was two and a half years ago.”
Another step. She turned enough to acknowledge his presence while still avoiding his gaze. He’d placed special emphasis on how old the photograph was. But yet here it was, on his fridge. She let her eyelids drift close for a moment. It was none of her business.
She felt the warmth of his fingers before they grazed the outside of her fist. The touch was brief and functional in nature, although her body didn’t seem to get that message. She covered an unconscious sigh of pleasure with a polite smile and accepted the proffered mug of coffee from his other hand.
She sipped the sweet, hot liquid. She didn’t put sugar in her coffee anymore, and the punch of nostalgia was more than she could bear. A single tear slipped down her cheek and she pinched her eyes closed, furious at herself.
He didn’t say anything, turning instead to get himself a cup, when they were interrupted by a quiet whine from the living room. She jerked her head, and Kyle laughed as the whine was followed by a thump. “Buddy’s been pretty patient, but I think he wants to meet you.” He raised his voice slightly. “Okay, come here.”
A medium sized black and white dog padded into view and Laney couldn’t help but let out a happy sigh. “Hello there!” She dropped to her knees and let him sniff her all over. “Aren’t you a quiet puppy. So patient. Yes, yes, you are. Good boy.”
Above her, Kyle chuckled. She glanced up and her heart squeezed hard at the warm expression on his face. Buddy rubbed his nose into her shoulder, but he was just another reminder of how very different their lives had turned out. Laney didn’t have a house plant, let alone a living, breathing dependent.
