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She fought to hold his gaze despite her first reaction being to run. ‘Tell me. Has it got something to do with that phone call that kept you up the night before last? Who was it?’
‘It was Fiona.’
‘Fiona?’ She didn’t know a Fiona and yet he spoke as if she did. ‘I don’t know anyone called Fiona. What has she got to do with us?’
‘Fiona is my ex.’
‘Oh.’ She could physically feel the enthusiasm, the excitement she’d felt moments ago seep from her pores. ‘Fiona is your ex.’
‘Yes.’ Josh nodded slowly.
‘You’re getting back with Fiona.’ Her voice was flat, emotionless.
‘She’s moving back to England. She’s decided travelling isn’t for her. She’s seen enough.’
‘Right.’
Josh held his hands out, palms upwards. ‘She wants to get back together. She wants to give things between us another go.’
Tammy forced herself to breathe, forced herself to tear her eyes from him. That was it. Tammy could never compete with the shared memories, the experiences Josh and shared with his ex, the life they’d had together. She just couldn’t. She pushed herself to standing. ‘I should go.’
‘No, don’t go. Tammy, please?’
Her legs felt like jelly as she half-walked, half-stumbled down the stairs. Speckles of light danced in front of her eyes as she pushed open the front door, the cool night air a slap in the face.
‘Are you heading back now, love?’
Turning around, Tammy blinked. Ian was standing next to the rowing boat, a couple of people Tammy hadn’t met before sitting patiently on the wooden benches. ‘Umm... yes, please.’
‘Hop in then, love.’
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AS SOON AS THE ROWINGboat reached the beach, Tammy jumped out into the shallow water, mumbled her thanks and hurried away. She needed to be alone. It didn’t matter where, but she needed to think. She ran up the concrete steps and across the cobbles towards the bakery.
Pushing the door open, Tammy shut it firmly behind her and sank to the floor. Leaning her head back against the door, she closed her eyes, letting the hot tears fall down her cheeks. Josh was getting back with his ex. He was getting back with Fiona.
She laughed. A hollow, raspy sound escaping from the base of her throat. At least she hadn’t been his one-before-the-bride, no she’d been his distraction. Just a mere distraction before getting back with the obvious love of his life. All that talk about them having grown apart, of Fiona wanting to travel not being the reason their relationship had ended. It had all been lies.
Thinking back to the conversation she’d had with Elsie she felt the fierce flush of pure embarrassment burn her skin. Elsie had asked if she’d still be happy moving down to Penworth Bay if she and Josh didn’t last, and Tammy had told her so confidently that she would be. She said she wouldn’t regret the decision if her relationship ended with Josh.
Sinking her head into her lap, she pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes, a dancing redness replacing her vision. She had meant it. At the time she’d meant it and she had been sure, never even imagining for one second that he would go back to his ex. Fiona would be moving into the lighthouse, to the bay and probably straight away as she wouldn’t have anywhere to live, not after having been gallivanting across the globe or wherever she’d been travelling.
What would Tammy be gaining if she moved down here? A life by the sea, new friends that she’d quickly begun to care for, being part of Elsie’s bakery family. Yes, all of that, but she’d still be living near Josh and Fiona. No, they weren’t Andrew and Jennifer, who she’d known for years. But the short, barely-anything relationship she’d had with Josh had felt real. It had felt more alive than the one she’d had with Andrew had done in years. Could she stomach seeing Josh and Fiona around the bay? Seeing them down on the beach or at the pub on quiz night? Sitting next to them during Elsie’s bakery family dinners?
She wasn’t sure. She wasn’t sure what she should do now. Would she even be offered the manager job back at the branch near home after she’d rung the executive manager up and begged for a transfer before she’d even begun the job?
Possibly not. Probably not. She’d lose Josh and her new job all in one.
Chapter
‘How are you getting on in here, Tammy?’ Teresa walked into the kitchen and placed an empty cake stand on the tabletop.
Tammy nodded, forcing a smile. ‘I’m okay, thanks.’
‘Are you sure? You’ve been really quiet all day. And you disappeared early last night. Josh was looking for you.’ Teresa leaned against the table.
‘Was he?’ She shook her head and continued kneading the bread dough in front of her. It didn’t matter. So what? He hadn’t been able to find her to officially break things off then.
