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I give his hair a teasing tug, remembering how exhilarated he got when we contrived to steal Ster. Torstem’s financial records a few weeks ago. “And you love it.”
Alek bows his head closer to mine. “Yes, I do.”
It’s strange seeing him in his mask now that I know what he looks like beneath it. I trace my fingers along the edge of it at his jaw. “I didn’t want to leave without doing that first. I hope that soon we’ll have enough time for me to see all of you again.”
He chuckles and leans in to brush a kiss to my cheek. “There’s a lot of you I’d like to see,” he murmurs by my ear. “Gods, I wish we could spend time together on anything other than meetings. If you didn’t have to be so careful with Ster. Torstem’s people watching you…”
“We can hope that won’t be for long.”
I don’t want to think about where we’ll end up when there is no more conspiracy to tackle. Will I be able to stay at the college? How would we get on if I have to return to my old haunts?
Those are problems for another day.
“We should get back,” I say, but I can’t resist gripping the front of his shirt and stealing one more quick kiss.
Right as Casimir steps past the doorway.
“There are a few chocolates left, if either of you—” he’s saying, but his warm voice falters as Alek and I jerk apart.
I grab the scholar’s hand before he can get too far, abruptly afraid he’ll take my startled reaction as shame. As I squeeze Alek’s fingers, Casimir’s gaze flicks between us.
I wait for him to laugh or make a playful remark about our subterfuge. It isn’t as if I’d expect the courtesan of all people to be offended by anyone indulging in a brief moment of bliss, even someone he’s done the same with himself.
But just for a second, the light fades from Casimir’s gorgeous face. In that moment, he looks so lost I forget how to breathe.
He recovers quickly with a straightening of his posture and a hasty smile that doesn’t totally cover the awkwardness of the moment. “I— Well, never mind. I apologize for accidentally interrupting.”
He retreats with a brisk bob of his head. I stare after him through a few thumps of my pulse, an ache expanding through my chest.
Was he actuallysadto see me with another man? Why would it even matter to him, unless—
I shake myself out of my daze and turn back to Alek… who’s watching me with a wistful but not accusing expression.
“You should go after him,” he says. “Tell him how you feel.”
My fingers tighten around his where I’m still clutching his hand. “No. I don’t— It doesn’t change anything about how I feel aboutyou. I told you—”
“I know. And I told you I wasn’t sure you should have to choose.” He steps closer and tips his head to press a kiss to my forehead. “I’m sure now that youshouldn’t. Signy managed to juggle three lovers. I think you’re nimble enough to handle two.”
I sputter a laugh. “I’m hardly another Signy.”
“I don’t know. I think someday they’ll be weaving tapestries and singing songs about you too.” Alek nudges me toward the door. “I want to see how happy you can look when you’re getting all the devotion you deserve. Go on, orI’llhave to confess on your behalf.”
I can’t say whether it’s the tenderness of his words or the panic that he might carry out his final threat that propels me back into the main meeting room.
Stavros and Benedikt have already departed, thank all that’s holy. Casimir is just gathering the napkins that were scattered on the table.
As I hurry over to him, he sets them on the box of chocolates and spins toward his ring of cord.
“Casimir,” I say. “I—”
“It’s all right,” he breaks in swiftly, with a much more convincing smile now that he’s had more time to gather himself. “I’m happy for you both. I was only surprised I hadn’t realized sooner. I’ll leave you to—”
“Wait.” I grasp his elbow.
Casimir turns back toward me to meet my gaze. Staring into his deep blue eyes, I find my thoughts have scrambled.
How am I supposed to “confess” in any way that doesn’t sound ridiculous? What if I mistook his reaction just now and he really was simply surprised?
