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Lexie made a face. “Yeah, well I’m pretty sure I’ve done a good job of proving I’m not that little anymore.” Underneath the blanket, she rubbed her nipples over the fabric of her dress; they were still sore and tingling. Touching them reminded her of how hot the scene had been before he’d ruined it.
The door to the locker room opened, and Mistress Lisa walked in. Since Lexie had planted herself on the farthest bench from the door, so no one could just look in and see her, Mistress Lisa had to cross the entire locker room.
“Here sweetie,” she said, when she was close enough, tossing a shiny, bronze object at her. Lexie instinctively reached out to catch it, dropping her blanket in the process.
Always on top of mothering, Maria pulled the blanket right back up and tucked it securely around Lexie’s shoulders so it wouldn’t fall as easily.
“Patrick thought you might need that,” Mistress Lisa said as Lexie looked at the giant Twix bar in astonishment. He kept Twix bars in his office for her? For one joyous moment, her heart leaped up, right before plummeting right back down again.
“I don’t have fucking sub-drop!” she said savagely as she passed her water bottle to Jessica so she could rip open the Twix.
“Yes, you do, honey,” Olivia said. It was actually the first thing she’d said since coming into the room, Lexie realized. Uncharacteristically, she’d just been standing and listening without saying a single word. Not even the murmured encouragement Maria and Jessica had been surrounding her with. Mistress Lisa just shook her head and headed back out of the locker room. Olivia studied Lexie, not even noticing the other Domme had left. “Eat your chocolate.”
Jessica rubbed Lexie’s back, regarding her sympathetically. “Sub-drop’s a bitch, the chocolate will help.”
“Angel says they’re like dementor attacks,” Maria said, grinning as she nudged Lexie with her shoulder.
“Angel is a nerd.”
“She’s also right,” Olivia said, sounding amused. Her expression softened a bit as she looked at Lexie. “It’s the same idea. Once you feel better, you’ll realize you’ve had a major drop.”
“Yeah, because Patrick was a jerk.”
“It was also the timing, sweetie. Eat. You’ll feel better.”
Obediently, Lexie took a bite of her candy bar. The chocolate and caramel seemed to explode on her tongue, more intense than she remembered. Mmm, creamy. And crunchy. The balance of texture was exactly what she needed, and she quickly took another two bites without any prompting. It was like her body had just woken up and realized what it was craving.
“Don’t forget to drink,” Jessica said, handing back the water bottle. “You need the water too.”
“Thanks moms,” Lexie joked. Pretending to feel more normal. But it still felt like her emotions were ripping apart her insides. She was having trouble feeling just one thing. They ricocheted around inside of her, like spiked pinballs, sending her up and down so fast she could barely keep track of where her head was at. Tears sparked in her eyes again.
“Shh, it’s okay, just eat and drink,” Maria said, comforting her again. Probably thinking she was a huge crybaby.
“Make sure she eats the whole bar,” Olivia said, looking at the two women beside her. For just a moment, Lexie felt a small flare of resentment and anger. Obviously Olivia didn’t trust her to take care of herself either, but then again, Olivia thought she was suffering sub-drop. Which, to Lexie, sounded like another way of saying she was being irrational and dismissing her feelings. But she took another big bite of her candy bar anyway, under Olivia’s watchful eye. “I’m gonna go check on Patrick.”
As the redheaded Domme turned, Lexie had the sudden urge to go with her and find out how he was doing too. She squashed it down immediately, knowing part of the reason was that she wanted proof he was just as upset as she was right now. An uncomfortable silence fell while she was chewing.
“So how are you and Rick doing?” she asked Maria, trying to keep her voice normal, despite the envy that welled up inside of her. Why did everyone get the guy they wanted except for her?
Maria’s cheeks turned pink, which looked particularly pretty with her mane of wild, dark curls framing her face. The older woman had the kind of voluptuous curves Lexie sometimes dreamed about, which also made her particularly nice to snuggle up to. She was definitely the mothering sort.
“We’re good. I think I’m ready to start coming to the club on a more regular basis now, although we’ll probably stick to the private rooms.”
“That’s what Hilary and Liam do, too,” Jessica said encouragingly. “It’d be great to see more of you guys. I swear, I feel like half of our social life revolves around this club.”
Probably because it did, Lexie thought, a little cynically. That was another problem. Stronghold was where all of her friends gathered on the weekends. Not just to play, but also just to see each other before and after scening. Lexie wanted to be a part of that, but without the babysitter watching over her at the bar while everyone else went off to play. That wasn’t fair to her or whichever one of her Sentinels got stuck with babysitting duty.
Maria and Jessica’s chatter wove around her, kind of soothing in its normalcy, as she finished the rest of her candy bar and water. The conversation moved to Hilary’s wedding and, like Lexie had thought, Maria seemed totally fine with not being a bridesmaid. She and Jessica started bouncing ideas for the bachelorette party, from the low-key (a night in with lots of booze and movies) to the outrageous (Vegas). Lexie tried to pay attention, to keep from focusing on her own dark thoughts.
She was finally starting to calm down, but she was still pissed. She also didn’t want to be in the club anymore. This was Patrick’s turf, and she was feeling too vulnerable, too raw, to deal with him again tonight.
“Can one of you see if Patrick’s standing outside the door?” she asked, interrupting their conversation. She felt a little bad, but she also knew neither of them minded. Jessica immediately hopped up.
“Sure, sweetie.” The curvy brunette swayed on her high heels through the locker room before peeking out the door. She turned back, shaking her head. “I don’t see him.”
Lexie yanked on her shoes and lurched to her feet, suddenly feeling claustrophobic, like the club was a tiny box she needed to escape from. Adrenaline pounded through her, not out of anger this time, but out of the desire to flee. The fight response had worn off and now she was ready for flight. She needed to get home and regroup before she could face him again. Otherwise, she might just burst into tears. She was not going to be another Marissa, pushing a guy into a relationship with her because of tears and a tantrum. The idea that her crying might be more important to Patrick than Jake’s permission was tempting, in a crazy-bitch, manipulative kind of way. She was feeling a little crazy right now, but not that crazy. Which meant she needed to get out of here while the getting was good, until she felt like she could face him again without turning into a mess.
Catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror, she groaned and quickly went over to the sink to scrub off the streaks of mascara and eyeliner on her cheeks. Maria helped, efficiently managing to remove twice of what Lexie did on her own, while Jessica kept peeking out of the door.
