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She rests her head on my chest and I kiss the top of her head.
“This is real for me,” I whisper.
“For me too.”
I close my eyes, relieved and thankful she’s feeling the same.
No other words are spoken as we both drift off to sleep.
Naked.
In each other's arms.
We’re having a quiet breakfast in our room. After last night, I wasn’t ready to share her with the rest of the Frost family just yet.
“You really don’t have to pretend to like this thing,” she says, jabbing her thumb toward the Frost Family Cup I have sitting in the middle of the table.
“I don’t pretend. I’m not a child. This is a prestigious award I’m proud to display.”
She laughs, shaking her head, looking gorgeous. Her hair is piled on top of her head, wearing just a nightshirt with her one knee pulled up onto the chair. She looks just as sexy as she did last night when she was coming all over me.
“You’re ridiculous.”
I lift my shoulder as I sip my coffee. “Don’t be jealous.”
She rolls her eyes as she smirks.
Yesterday she asked me about my family and we got interrupted. It’s not something I like to talk about, but for the first time ever, I want to.
I want to let January into the deepest parts of me.
I clear my throat as I put my coffee down. Her eyes lift to mine as she chews her pancakes.
“Yesterday you asked me where my mom is and we got interrupted.” She nods, adjusting herself in the chair. “My mother’s in a nursing home. This isn’t easy for me, so I just need to say it.” She nods. “She worked her ass off to take care of me all by herself and what did she get for it? Alzheimer’s.”
“Nicholas, I’m so sorry. How advanced?”
I shake my head, glancing down for a moment to collect myself. “She has good days where she remembers who I am, but those are few and far between these last few years.” I lift my eyes to January’s and I see the emotion swimming in them. “She took care of me and now I take care of her. She’s in the best facility money can buy, with the best doctors in the field. The nurses she has are amazing with her and I’m grateful for them all.”
She gets up and comes over, sitting on my lap. Her arms wrap around my neck and she rests her head on my shoulder.
“She’s lucky to have you.”
“No, I’m the lucky one. Remember the night I had you pick up that cake from Hoboken?”
“Yes. I remember being so mad about that.”
“Really? You were mad?”
“Who needs a birthday cake late at night, and from Hoboken?”
“My mother loves that bakery.”
January’s body stiffens. “I feel so awful. Was the cake for her?”
I nod, even though she can’t see me. “Yes. It was.”
She props up so she can look me in the eyes. “I’m so sorry. Had I known…” her words fall away.
I reposition her back to where her head is on my shoulder. “It’s ok. The night didn’t end too well. My mother ate one bite and threw the rest of it against the wall. She got agitated. Which I guess is normal.”
“For people with Alzheimer’s to get agitated?”
“Yeah. I guess they feel helpless and somewhere deep down I think they know they can’t remember and it makes them angry.”
She sits up to look at me with watery eyes. A tear rolls down her cheek as I swipe it away with my finger.
“Don’t cry for me, January. Please, it hurts me more to see you upset.”
She clears her throat, quickly wiping her eyes. “I’m sorry. I just can’t imagine. I’ve got this huge, loud, crazy family and you’ve only got your mother.”
“And you,” I say, searching her eyes to see if she’s feeling the same way I am.
She wraps her arms around my neck and holds on tightly. My heart widens deep in my chest. I can feel the weight of it. Like it’s expanding to let this woman in. To live there. It’s growing, blossoming like a weed that’ll never die, no matter how much I try to eradicate it.
I can feel her tears on my neck as she peppers it with kisses. Her hands roam up and down my back, moving to my arms. She straddles me and rubs herself against my hardening dick.
I lift her, walking toward the bed and sitting down with her still straddling me. She pulls at my shirt and I lift it off as she does the same with hers.
Damn.
I could get used to this. I could get used to somebody caring about me. Somebody who’ll worry about me.
Someone who’s there for me when my life gets to be too much.
Someone like her.
Chapter 11
January
* * *
I need to tell him. I have so many things to tell him. I have to tell him that I had planned on going to work for Pulse Gaming.
