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He leans in toward me and places a soft kiss on my lips and my core clenches. I grab his shoulders, pulling him closer to me and kiss him harder. I part my lips, licking his bottom one and he groans.
“Fuckkk, Angel. Feel what you do to me.” He takes my hand from his hair and places it on his hardness. “I’m yours, Angel, and I’m not going anywhere. I’m so fucking sorry I made you feel like that, but I promise I’m going to ride out the storm that is Alex Monroe.” We laugh.
“I guess I am a bit like this weather, huh?”
He looks out the window at the rain falling around us and says, “Yeah, you really are. Instead of naming a star after you, I’ll name a storm.”
“Ha, very fucking funny.” I roll my eyes at him. “What are you looking at up there?” I smack him for being an asshole, he always makes fun of me for rolling my eyes.
“Let me drive, baby. Let’s go grab some food and I’ll come back for my truck later.”
I climb over the middle console as he makes his way around the car and jumps into the front seat, his hair soaked from the rain.
“We love rainy days don’t we, baby?”
“You asshole. Why would you quote that book right now!?’
“I’m sorry, kind of but not really. I’m jealous that a fictional guy can make you cry and feel all these emotions but me, I get nothing.”
“I literally just poured my heart out to you, Kohen,” I say, crossing my arms over my chest to show him I mean business.
“I know, and it’s about damn time. If the guy from theRavenwoodgets your tears, I deserve them, too. Pick me, choose me, love me,” he laughs out loud, his dimple pressing deep into his cheek.
“It’sRavenhoodnotRavenwood,and now you're quotingGrey’s Anatomy,too?” I ask, my laughter ringing through the car, matching his.
“What can I say? I’m a sucker for love, and you are just going to have to deal with it.”
This is the second time he mentionsloverecently and the word alone is enough to make me want to vomit. There is no way we could love each other. None, but I also can’t deny that there is a force between us that has pulled us together since moment one. I don’t know how, why, or what it is, but I know he feels it too.
“Kohen?”
“Yeah, Angel?”
“Do you believe in love at first sight? Or like soul mates?”
He pauses to stare at me before continuing to back out of the parking spot. “Yeah, I do. Do you?”
Neither one of us is looking at each other.
“I don’t know, I don’t want to, though.” I sneak a peek at him from the corner of my eye and he is running one hand though his gorgeous hair and using the other to handle the steering wheel.
“That’s fair,” he admits as he looks over to me. I can tell he wants to say something, but he doesn’t. So, neither of us speaks for the rest of the ride. Kohen stares intently at the road and I close my eyes, thoughts drifting to all the what if’s we could have.
32
KOHEN
Istare at the beautiful girl in my bed as I sip my coffee. I can’t believe she came to find me after our argument the other day. She has really opened up and I’m hoping I have shown her that I’m not going anywhere. She is mine. I’m not giving her up for anything. The pull I have felt to her since the moment I laid eyes on her and caught the scent of her lavender shampoo as we crossed paths on those steps… I didn’t know it would turn into this. Erica was the girl I thought I loved but it’s nothing in comparison to what I feel for Alex.
It’s crazy as fuck to think I love her, but I do. I love this crazy fucking girl. I'm not telling her anytime soon, though. There is an invisible tether between us that binds us together, it makes as much sense as gravity holding us to earth does. I sound like a pussy, but I’m grateful for anything in this world. It’s the way my mom raised me. She taught me about true love. Her words stick with me. She always said, “Real men love deeply, and they love with their whole heart, Kohen Lee. I want you to be a man unafraid of love. Don’t be like your father, he isn’t capable of love, only ownership. Promise me, Lee.”
“I promise, Mom.”
My father cheated so often that she wanted to make sure I was a better man than he is. So, I strive to be. My first love is who I lost it to, I thought we would get married. I was naive. The second girl I slept with was my first and only one-night stand. Then there was a friend I had that agreed to a platonic friend with benefits situation. She was two years older and we grew up around each other at our summer house in Florida, but that ended when she graduated. The last girl I slept with was my most recent ex-girlfriend, Erica. She was exotic and interesting, a model and an aspiring actress but she was self-centered, spoiled, and righteous. She wanted to be treated like a queen but acted like a spoiled daddy’s girl princess and she treated people like shit. I couldn’t do it anymore and her cheating was the icing on the fucking cake. It still broke me a little inside because I fell in love with her before I saw her ugly side, and that’s why I accepted it for so long. Blinders man, they keep you stupid for a long time.
My girl stirs in the sheets of my bed and I set my coffee cup down, rejoining her. Her warmth envelops me as she moves closer to my body, wrapping her arm around my waist and placing her head on my chest. I inhale her scent, my drug, my addiction.
No one before her compares. She has intoxicated me. I hate that I have to leave her this week. I have to remain focused on my goals. This meet is important to my Olympic career, I have to go. I want to invite her but I know my father will be present and I don’t want him to ruin this.
