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My eyelids grew heavy, and I knew there was no point in trying to make any sense of it that night. I wasn’t a mind reader and couldn’t pretend to understand what was going through Melody’s head, other than the bit we shared in our mutual attraction. There was also the lingering stress over the fact that I still hadn’t told her how long the renovations were going to take. I meant to tell her all night long, but it never seemed like the right time.
I drank down the last of my beer, tossed the bottle in the trash, and flipped off the lights throughout the house before going to bed.
Many nights, memories of Rebecca would comfort and lull me to sleep. I clung to them especially tight that night, remembering the small things. How warm her side of the bed would be when she was in it, snuggled up beside me. The feeling of her hand reaching around my chest and her lips kissing the back of my neck. I would have done anything right then to see her on top of me, her naked body bathed in the moonlight streaming through the window.
The intensity of the urge was enough to knock me out. The memories and longings shifted seamlessly into a vivid dream. My body spasmed with pleasure as I ran my hands up and down her silky skin. Her long hair fell all around her shoulders, trickling over her breasts. I reached up to touch them, but when she rolled her head and tossed her hair to reveal her face, Melody was staring back at me.
I jerked awake, not surprised to see a tent formed in the sheets between my legs. I swung my legs around to the side of the mattress and buried my face in my hands. It was unsettling to have Melody intruding on those spaces in my brain, which had only ever been reserved for Rebecca since the first time I told her I loved her.
“Daddy?” Em’s tiny voice croaked from the doorway.
“Em, go back to bed, baby. Daddy’s okay. I just had a…dream.” I couldn’t exactly bring myself to say it was a bad dream. That would have been a lie.
“But I’m going to be late for school!”
My eyes darted over to the clock, and I saw it was twenty minutes past when we usually left the house.Dammit.
I rushed into the kitchen and poured her a bowl of cereal, then quickly slipped into some clean clothes so we could scramble out the door. She was going to be late for school, I’d be late for work, and the day was off to a rough start, all thanks to Melody andthat kissand all the crazy dreams that followed.
16
MELODY
I sat up in bed and planted my face in my palm. I was hoping I’d wake up with the relief of it all being a bad dream, though it wasn’t really fair to call itbad. In fact, in dream land, that kiss would have been sublime. Because there were no real consequences in dream land.
But in reality, I had kissed the man who I hired to renovate my house. Did he count as being an employee of mine? I didn’t know the sexual harassment laws and policies for hiring contract construction workers, but, I was positive surprise kissing them on the lips had to violate at least one or two of them.
I had kissed a man who was just trying to be friendly, trying to help me out by showing me around town. A man who, on top of everything else, thought I was engaged. The look on his face that followed the kiss kept playing in my head on repeat, and that humiliation felt more like a nightmare than a dream.
Reluctantly, I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and told myself I was going to do everything in my power to keep things from being weird when he showed up for work that morning, if that was even possible.
As I washed my face and got dressed for the day, the only thing that stood out in my mind more than how foolish I felt for kissing him like that was just howgoodthat kiss was.So very good. He’d only kissed me back for the briefest moment, but it was enough for me to feel sparks like I had never felt before. I touched my fingertips to my bottom lip, swearing I could still feel a lingering tingle. Not once had kissing Evan ever felt like that.
I hesitated for a moment in the kitchen, wondering if I should make a big enough pot of coffee for sharing the way I always did. Little things like that might come across differently now. I stood there with the coffee pot suspended in my hand near the running water from the sink for far longer than I should have, overthinking everything.
Don’t be ridiculous, Melody. Yes, you assaulted him with a kiss out of nowhere that neither of you saw coming, but now the least you can do is offer the man some coffee.
I put the full pot on to brew and braced myself against the kitchen counter. I had two nauseating options, both of which were humiliating and pitiful. I could either let him think I was a no-good cheater like Evan, or I could tell the truth and try to explain why on earth I’d ever lie to him about being engaged.
As I lamented over which scenario might be the lesser of two evils, I glanced up to the clock on the stove just in time to realize he would be here any minute. I barely had a few seconds to pull myself together before the doorbell rang.
After flinging the door open, I was surprised to see the crew standing there with no Derek.Oh god, it was worse than I thought. He was going to quit or have his brother or someone take over the job.
“Good morning,” I said in confusion, showing them in. “Um, where is Derek?” I was almost afraid to ask. What if he had told everyone?
“Running late this morning,” one of the men answered nonchalantly.
No one was looking at me sideways or whispering things amongst themselves about me. Maybe Derek had been kind enough to keep my misstep a secret. Still, I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. Was Derek avoiding me? Did that have something to do with him being late? I couldn’t tell if my intuition was accurate or if my nerves had my judgment all out of whack. Either way, I needed to clear my head.
“No problem,” I replied. “Can you tell Derekwhenhe gets here orifhe gets here, that I’m going to the coffee shop to work today?”
“You got it, ma’am.”
I stuffed my laptop in a bag and bolted out the door. I sucked in deep breaths of the fresh air on my bike ride over, wishing it would vanquish the anxious feelings swarming around inside of me like bees. I felt a little better by the time I walked into Lakeside Coffee House with its strong smells of roasting coffee beans and baked pastries. All I needed was to get lost in work for a while, and all of these little worries would seem like just that by the time I came back to earth. None of it was such a big deal, really. Or at least that’s what I would keep telling myself until it felt true.
But getting into the work zone was harder than I thought it’d be, unfortunately. The Wi-Fi kept cutting out every few minutes, making it impossible to get anything done.
“Uh, excuse me,” I said to the barista as she kneeled over to refill my cup of coffee. “Is there something wrong with your Wi-Fi? It doesn’t seem to be working very well, and I was just wondering if maybe I’d have better luck somewhere else if yours is having issues today.”
