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But Ellister will be there with me.
My mother’s anger toward him yesterday is totally understandable now. So is my dad’s comment a few minutes ago about this being Ellister’s fault.
It is. He did this. But after seeing into the heart of him, it’s hard to be mad. I don’t think he would’ve chosen this life for himself. He was forced into it, just as I will be.
I give my parents a small smile as I try to think of what to say. Because what’s this last conversation supposed to include? Goodbyes and declarations of love? Apologies and forgiveness? It seems so cliché.
I finally settle on, “So, Waylon wasn’t so crazy, after all.”
“I can barely believe it.” Mom shakes her head. “It doesn’t seem real.”
“When did you find out?”
“Just two days ago,” Dad replies, his chin quivering. “We didn’t agree to this. We’d never do that.”
“I know. You’re not really selling the farm, right?”
“No. I would’ve given it up for you, though. It was actually Ellister’s idea to try to make a trade—the farm for you—so we could reverse what’s happening to you, but it didn’t work out.”
“You all tried to save me. I appreciate that.”
Rubbing my hand, my mom attempts an upbeat tone when she tells me, “You won’t be gone. You’ll just be somewhere else.”
Dad’s nostrils flare with anger as he looks to Ellister. “Can she come back to visit?”
I hadn’t considered the possibility because my relocation seemed so final in Ellister’s mind, but I glance at him with hope.
His face is an impassive mask when he talks to my parents. “It’s unlikely Vaeront would agree to such a thing, but I promise to try. My power is my own, and I’m willing to risk his wrath for Hannah.”
Vaeront’s wrath is unknown to me, but through the connection with Ellister, I see metal shackles that burn the skin and torture in the form of starvation and isolation.
I can’t imagine allowing him to go through that for me, so I write off the possibility, accepting that this will probably be the last time I ever see my parents.
“Try not to be sad, okay?” Wetness floods my eyes, and I blink rapidly. “After I’m gone, don’t be mad or guilty either. My destiny was written a long time ago, and there’s nothing you could’ve done differently. I’m just thankful for the wonderful life you gave me. I’m so lucky. So, so lucky to have had you.”
Tears run down my dad’s cheeks. “We’re the lucky ones, Hannah.”
Leaning against Dad’s shoulder, Mom sobs, “We’ve never loved anything or anyone the way we love you.”
“Each other,” I remind them, my words quiet as I struggle not to slip away into another unconscious episode. “You still have each other, and I’ll be at peace knowing you’ll still have the farm. I…” My eyelids flutter, darkness closes in for a second, and the bargain pulses between Ellister and me with urgency. “I have to go.”
HANNAH
Going through the vortex is chaos. For a few long seconds, as I cling to Ellister, I’m totally directionless. There’s wind, darkness, and the sensation of dropping at a swift rate.
Then there’s light.
Ellister breaks my fall, his back hitting the ground next to the wildflowers with a grunt. I’m on top of him, straddling him, and I’m not in a hurry to move.
I never want to let him go.
“I think—” I lift my head to look down at his face. “I think I love you.”
With the saddest expression I’ve ever seen, he slowly shakes his head. “It’s not real.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s my emotions,” he explains. “They’re infecting you.”
